split stuff

#1
the_guru said:
Thank the fcuking Lord that the NAAFI has got back to the serious issues.

I had one on Flying Falcon 83 that was the same length as my SMG with the butt folded up. I had a Burger King on Telic 1 after a long time on MRE's and Compo and it came flying out of my Dung Trumpet about 40 minutes later with the colour, temp and consistancy of Starbucks coffee.
Flavour??
 
#2
Cuddles said:
the_guru said:
Thank the fcuking Lord that the NAAFI has got back to the serious issues.

I had one on Flying Falcon 83 that was the same length as my SMG with the butt folded up. I had a Burger King on Telic 1 after a long time on MRE's and Compo and it came flying out of my Dung Trumpet about 40 minutes later with the colour, temp and consistancy of Starbucks coffee.
Flavour??
Peppermint Latte.....Natch.
 
#3
I did one once with a dent in the end; it made me question the company I was keeping and my alcohol consumption. 8O
 
#4
Cuddles said:
It lay their on the inspectionplatz which all boxhead aborts have and grinned at me. The foothills were deep choclatey brown, rising up through the lower slopes to a light fawn colour before an almost cream ending and a twisted "classic nipsy" log protruding out of the jeelified poo mass. It was unbelievable and reminded me of those milk chocolate/white chocolate Guylian sweets.
That is, in all seriousness, the most beautiful thing I've heard all day.

You truly are a poet, cuddles.

*hat off*
 
#5
ha ha ha ha ha ha ha(crack) ............... i just broke a rib
 
#6
My best Sh1ts are the Big Fat Hard ones, They are not messy, Dont stick to my hands and just drip niceley out my arrse so i dont have to use toilet paper :D .

But the sloppy ones can be wiped anywhere and on anything, I somtimes feel the stomach acid burning very mildley on my hands when i pick them up.
 
#7
I dont want to break per sek but,

I have two arasses, well one and a rip, and sometimes when i wipe, the gink sludge is accompanied by what can only be described as dracula's packed lunch! but only when i do a big hard one! (shite that is)
 
#8
My daughter is sitting here asking me what I'm laughing at! I don't have the heart to tell her....
 
#9
Bonney Eberdnu sells turds, find him on any south east england trains!.
 

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