split stuff

#4
Ah! Gotcha. Nice one. Does it have to be between two blokes? Kinda turned my stomach that bit. But I could see me doing it to me Julie. Except her name's Sally.
 
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#6
Geordie_Blerk said:
I don't suppose that this would be catagorised as a skiff per se but the dynamics are similar;

Many moons ago, I shared a 3 man room in N. Ireland. Occupant number two ( Kenny ) had a deep rooted passion for humping scaggs and scutters. Occupant three ( Scottie ) was an inbred a - hole from the Outer Hebredies who had a severe snoring problem.

One particular day, Kenny had just returned from the medical centre with a spring in his step and pus dripping from his old boy. He had recently been nuts deep in a young "virgin" from the WRAC and fallen foul of non specific urintheritis or NSU to the TLA lovers.

This affliction was a badge of honour to Kenny but did have its drawbacks, the main one being the foul smelling substance leaking out of him.
Kenny always slept naked and his disease meant that his bed sheet was becoming attached to his bell end. The solution was easy.....use a wad of bog roll to wedge under the foreskin thus sealing up the offending area!

This is where Scottie enters the tale. As earlier stated Scottie had a snoring problem (admittedly more of a problem for myself and Kenny) because he was a fat lazy sloth. On the evening of Kenny's diagnosis he was having his usual 14 hours kip, mouth wide open, dribbling and honking away. Kenny was having ergonomic difficuties with his Andrex plug so decided to remove it for closer inspection. It resembled a micro Ginsters pasty but with more filling, albeit more fish based than meat. " This needs replacing" said Kenny and with one swift movement deposited the offending item in Scottie's open mouth.
Scottie gave a small cough, swallowed and carried on snoring. Kenny chuckled to himself and lit a fag as if he'd just enjoyed a sex act. I retched and heaved till I felt pain in my testicles :D

Not strictly skiffing but one of the most nauseating spectacles I have seen to this day. Poo on your top lip.....Ha, I laugh at poo on your top lip! :D
Classic. That would be the vegetarian 'cheese' skiff, I think :lol: :lol:
 
#7
Mayonaise and cheese is of the menu for a few days. 8O
Classic. :D
 
#9
Door_Bundle_Mk2 said:
Nope, you're confusing skiffing with the old eighties favourite of "The Red Eye", sometimes referred to as "Queening". No probs though as it is a common mistake. To further add confusion you also have the "3 man lift" which is an offshoot of "The Red Eye" which involves 3 persons plus the victim.
normally involving mortar plt? :wink:
 
#10
Excellent Idear Sir!!!! Carry on!!!! Skiffing!!!!! Just wondering if any of the chaps on last night get together had the oppertunity to distinguish themselves?????? whilst on the lash!!!
DD :twisted:
 

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