Lordy, I could do with suffering with priapism. I have enough problems getting it up, and with drink inside me, it's a big massive no-no. Not even Pam Anderson shaking her melons at me could get it up after a few bevvies.
Priapism is obviously a serious problem. But to any switched-on soldier, a problem is merely another obstacle to overcome. So :-
1 - You now have somewhere to hang your beret, no need to stuff it into a pocket or tuck into your belt loops.
2 - You have an instant centre pole for your basha
3 - Jacking up a landrover has never been quicker
4 - never forget your pool cue ever again
5 - useful pointing device for instructional purposes
6 - A useful "attitude adjuster" for beating unruly crows to death
7 - Cheat on BPFA press ups
8 - Donut and onion ring storage facility
Or alternatively you could just play Chinese Helicopter Pilot 24 hours a day