Speaking American.

#2
I sense a bit of a wind-up there...

For starters, Americans call their bastardised version of our beautiful mother tongue "English" as well...



This person has really given the game away with their (almost) flawless grammar and spelling though.
 
#4
I call WAH!
 
#5
Almost right but they forgot the part Noah played in all this. After 39 days and nights at sea, Noah's missus complained about smell coming from below decks where all the animals were and threatened to thump Noah if he didn't do something about it. So Noah got Shem, Ham and Japheth to shovel it all overboard in one great big pile.
Five thousand years or so later, Columbus came along, discovered it and called it America.
 
#6
Columbus discovered shit. We weren't lost - Columbus was. He thought he was in China and he was looking forward to getting his hands on cheaply made tat that he could sell to the naive and credulous in Europe. Meanwhile we were quite content bimbling along without European interferance cheerfully hacking away at each other. We had stone buildings with indoor pumbing and writing, Man! It was a golden age I tell you! (Except for the Mexicans. Nobody liked the Mexicans.) ;-)

 
#7
Columbus discovered shit. We weren't lost - Columbus was. He thought he was in China and he was looking forward to getting his hands on cheaply made tat that he could sell to the naive and credulous in Europe. Meanwhile we were quite content bimbling along without European interferance cheerfully hacking away at each other. We had stone buildings with indoor pumbing and writing, Man! It was a golden age I tell you! (Except for the Mexicans. Nobody liked the Mexicans.) ;-)
So you agree with exbleep then. Thats nice.
 
#10
Linky to OP


Columbus discovered shit. We weren't lost - Columbus was. He thought he was in China and he was looking forward to getting his hands on cheaply made tat that he could sell to the naive and credulous in Europe. Meanwhile we were quite content bimbling along without European interferance cheerfully hacking away at each other. We had stone buildings with indoor pumbing and writing, Man! It was a golden age I tell you! (Except for the Mexicans. Nobody liked the Mexicans.) ;-)

My bold ... not true, shit was discovered in third world countries (first world countries being to posh for that sort of thing) and was used for building houses - hence the name shithouses. ^_~
 
#13
And continues so to do, in Americky.

What about Trick or Treat then? When did that become a cultural fucking landmark over here?
From Wikipedia.
The tradition of going from door to door receiving food already existed in Britain and Ireland, in the form of souling, where children and poor people would sing and say prayers for the dead in return for cakes.[SUP][1][/SUP] Guising — children disguised in costumes going from door to door for food and coins — also predates trick or treat, and is recorded in Scotland at Halloween in 1895, where masqueraders in disguise carrying lanterns made out of scooped out turnips, visit homes to be rewarded with cakes, fruit and money.[SUP][2][/SUP] While going from door to door in disguise has remained popular among Scots and Irish, the North American custom of saying "trick or treat" has recently become common
 
#15
And continues so to do, in Americky.

What about Trick or Treat then? When did that become a cultural fucking landmark over here?
You must be a right miserable old lemon then. What's your address so I'll remember to bring plenty of eggs.

 
#16
From Wikipedia.
The tradition of going from door to door receiving food already existed in Britain and Ireland, in the form of souling, where children and poor people would sing and say prayers for the dead in return for cakes. Guising — children disguised in costumes going from door to door for food and coins — also predates trick or treat, and is recorded in Scotland at Halloween in 1895, where masqueraders in disguise carrying lanterns made out of scooped out turnips, visit homes to be rewarded with cakes, fruit and money. While going from door to door in disguise has remained popular among Scots and Irish, the North American custom of saying "trick or treat" has recently become common.
Cheers. I thought ASDA had introduced it, 'cos it certainly wasn't as prevalent in the '60s '70s '80s and '90s as that article suggests.

There's no-one dead in my house at present, so visits from my local Ragamuffin contingent to sing and pray for them are unnecessary. It's just another fucking set-up for scrounging if you ask me. Whatever next?

Administrative Professionals Day (formerly known as Secretaries Day) is on April 25 next year, in case anyone needs telling. Fucks sake.
 

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