Speaka da lingo ?

Discussion in 'The Training Wing' started by polar69, Jan 18, 2007.

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  1. Having failed miserably at learning to talk English proper like I decided I should try to pick up some German lingo in time for my next jolly to the Sudatenland.

    As Arrse is brimming with squaddies who have spent many a weekend in Hamburg are there any phrases that would be useful

    I was thinking along the lines on "My landrover appears to have written of your VW polo, sorry"

  2. Mein luftkissenfahrzeug ist voller aalen-My hovercraft is full of eels
  3. Wo ist der Grill- und Fickpartei?

    Where's the BBQ and orgy?
  4. Wie viel fur einen oralverkehr?

    How much for a blowjob?
  5. Wie Viel kostet diene madchen? = Which way to the post office?
  6. "Ich habe Geschlecht mit Ihrer Mutter gehabt"

    Do you know the way to Berlin?
  7. Wie steht's mit einem preisnachlass habe ich nur einen kleinen penis bekommen?

    How about a discount, I've only got a small c0ck?
  8. Are you sure? I always thought madchen meant woman. Or have I just been wahed?
  9. No mate, just checked up on 'Toms Speak Eric' and it's definately 'Post Office'
  10. :headbang: Wahhed to the utter maximum!! :headbang:

    30 push ups, standby go.
  11. I've sort of left myself wide open here havnt I !! :frustrated:
  12. Heres another useful one.

    Fich mein altestiefel, die sperme is raus kommen = could I have fries with that please.
  13. Sie dont schwitzen viel fur ein fettes madchen.

    I would like to buy you a drink.
  14. You dont need to bother with spechen zie deutsch etc as Hamburg is a cosmopolitan place and most of them speak fairly good english to be honest.

    If you go on the Reeperbahn its not difficult to miss the ladies from the cabaret as they all used to wear ski suits and accost you as you move from bar to bar. Most of them are controlled by Russians and Eastern European gangs and will try and take you back to an apartment for a quick one and relieve you of your wallet.

    Avoid going for any of the birds in what is Herbertstrasse (just off Reeperbahn)which was known as 10 Mark Alley. Each end is gated by a huge metal screen. Its a laugh to window shop but all a bit clinical and a rip off. Its men only down there so any women who accompany you are likely to be abused or have a pishpot thrown at them etc

    There are plenty of strip bars, lapdance places etc but some are very ropey indeed

    If you want to chat up the locals you may need to practise a few key phrases and there are some stunning women around as Hamburg is a fairly affluent place

    Try and make it to the fishmarket which opens at dawn and is a good way of getting some much needed coffee and breakfast.

    PM me for any other info
  15. Sie boxen kopfe sind abfall, wir schlagen sie in beiden kriegen.

    Could you help me please officer? (when seeking assistance from the police)