Spams(no pun intended) spreading it around

Discussion in 'The Intelligence Cell' started by BlueDanubeWalt, Jan 17, 2008.

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  1. " I am Robert Ellis, a Master Sergeant and a room operating nurse with the United States Military and I am currently writing this mail to you from a local café in Southern Bagdad, one of the US base in Iraq.

    I was assigned to the ex-Iraqi leader (Saddam Hussein) as his nurse to keep him healthy and alive while in the US military detention before he was hanged on the 30th December 2006 and I as at then gave an interview, recounting the composure and lifestyle of late Mr. Hussein while with him on the 2nd of January 2007.

    Before his death, he confided in me due to my fondness and closeness to him some detailed information about an account which was dearest to him. He (Saddam) said he had some fund in Barclays Bank and he had an associate who is a joint signatory to the account but died earlier. The name he told me is one Rahman Adefaye (I don't know if this spelling is right) and that both men are the only persons with access code to receive the fund from the bank. He instructed me to help him transfer this said fund to his daughter's account, of which data he gave to me too.

    The initial money he said is US$20 Million and he further told me that I should keep any interest the money must have accrued. He gave me his banker/manager's info, an account number and a pass code, which is required to access the account and transaction, and that transfer could be initiated with this pass code.

    In the light of this and owing to the fact that I am currently not in the physical world, I need someone who can secure a transfer of this sum to an account until I am discharged from duty in March hence my communication to you. What it requires for this money to be received or transfered are these necessary information he gave me and I would like you to assist in the processing of the said information and give me a feedback on its status.

    Please mail me back as soon as possible to know your capacity in this regards i.e transferring such huge amount, keeping track of the transfer of this said sum, and your trustworthiness which will convince me to supply you the info on this issue.

    Ultimate confidentiality is required on your side as my position in the military would make me lie low and you as the active person in this deal should only communicate to me via this e-mail: and the money if received successfully would be shared in an almost equal proportion.

    Thank you.

    Well...makes a change from our erstwhile Nigerian comarades..!!.. :eek:
  2. Sh1t, you get e-mails from ghosts.
  3. Biped

    Biped LE Book Reviewer

    It's those damned Thetans again - watch out.
  4. Hmm, I think even Barclays would have noticed a cusromer Pres. S Hssain, No 1 Presidential Palace, Baghdad.

    Full marks for the inventive try though - this should be linked to the Nigerian something419 spam (not septic) baiting thread. Have fun.

    Edited for mong spelling.
  5. Are you saying the Thetans were in cahoots with Sadam? I know they were evil.
  6. Biped

    Biped LE Book Reviewer

    Not so much in cahoots exactly. The septic Thetans (and their slaves) Rummie and GWB, were having a bit of a spat about intergalactic communication rights with the Thetans in control (by happenstance) of Saddam and his coterie. Because they were effectively lost souls, they couldn't resort to having a punch-up (no bodies, but their slaves), and couldn't use their slaves to slug it out (unseemly to see such high-ranking human slaves having fisticuffs), so what they did was adopt the usual practice of getting their septic slaves to come up with a load of old human b0llocks in order to frighten the humans (who, being mortal, feared death).

    This led to the slave armies of the septic (and allied) Thetans invading the territories of the Islamic slaves (Islamic being a handy cover for the local branch of Thetism) in order to hunt down the errant Thete who was hogging all the super-hyperspacial bandwidth to Ursa Minor.

    Net result was that the errant Thete's slave got hung for all the other Thetans to see as a lesson, thus leading to the errant Thetan having to start all over again in the body of a new baby. It might seem like a long time to be out of politics to us, but you have to remember that it is a mere blink of the soul when these Thetans hang around (notice I didn't say 'live') for billions of years (you average Thetan employment contract lasts for 1 billion years).

    So, back to the main question: Why is a Thetan trying to launder the cash of another Thetan? Easy when you think about it really. The laundering Thetan has been asked by the 'baby-reincarnated' Thetan (Saddam's old owner) to grab that cash (or as much as it can) to put aside for when the 'baby-reincarnated' has stopped sh!tting and p!ssing itself (and going goo goo) for long enough to use said wedge to climb back up the Thetan soullshal tree.

    It's not taking the money to the big slaves because they might stop the 'baby-reincarnated' from regaining it's influence for a few more generations (I can't remember what the sentence was).

    This is why a lowly, mere mortal human slave is being offered this fine chance, because the Thetan hierarchy is very closely related to that of their human subjects. Thus, a lowest-of-the-low Thetan soul will most often be hosted by a chav and so forth.