Soooo...I managed to get a date in London

Discussion in 'Lonely Hearts' started by EdwardCoke, Dec 21, 2011.

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  1. So, I've jumped on the whole online dating malarley and have lined up a date of sorts in London. Brilliant, except I haven't a clue about London and have been out of this game for a fair while now! Hence, I've decided to surrender myself to the accumalated wisdom of the debonaire man-about-towns of Arrse.

    The scheme for the evening is along the lines of some food, followed by drinks. Can someone please recommend a nice, yet fairly casual place to dine and a nice, quiet bar for a drink after?
     
  2. Online dating? Sounds only fit for Wetherspoons and a quick escape when you meet the beast.
     
  3. Just because you thought a ginger boyfriend would be cheat-proof and he still decided to market himself on Gaydar, I don't think you should be so harsh on the online dating scene.
     
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  4. Oh god, you're filling me with confidence. I think you would make an excellent welfare officer. :)
     
  5. I'm here and I care.
     
  6. So have you got any recommendations for London?

    I promise that if she turns out to be a troglodyte with a gammy eye and false teeth , I will post details of my escape or capture on arrse for your enjoyment.
     
  7. Look here old chap, congratulations on securing a date and I'm sure some,m at least, are happy for you. Sure you know that dating sites are patrolled by some of the most psychotic , robbing, professional grifters on the planet. You might also know enough to find some clean watering hole near your landing station, and stick to coffees and pleasantries, before you part with any cash. Some of these buzzards go on several dates a month, all on freebies.

    Hell, some, if not most, have drink problems, a loony ex partner, abusive husband/boyfiend/girlfiend or even all of the feckin above. R's deliberately omitted there.

    Sure you also don't need any advice, so good luck and happy....erm whatever comes of it.
    And if it's a good date, nice person, genuine, stumps up fifty fifty ... not only will it be a bleedin' miracle but you can have best wishes and good luck from here ;)
     
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  8. Yes. A 5MT airburst with The Emirates as Ground Zero should tidy the place up a bit.
     
  9. Would the prevailing wind take the fallout anywhere useful?
     
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  10. I'm voting the Brie Louise (Euston) or Duchess of Cambridge (Stamford Brook). Both CAMRA-known real ale pubs who sell a wide range of things from the tap often exceeding 7 or 8%.

    Get her trollied, get yourself trollied, take her home and it doesn't matter what she looks like you can smash the shit out of her and in the morning you'll have enough of a hangover that what she looks like won't be of concern.
     
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  11. Yes but we need supporting photographic evidence.
     
  12. Mr Happy

    Mr Happy LE Moderator

    Brilliant.

    This used to work for me...

    Le petit jardin at covent garden. Table clothes and wine with nibbles.

    I can't seem to find it online, perhaps it closed down in the late 90's. Nevertheless (all theatreland restaurnats are the same)..

    Start with a bottle of chablis, she'll no doubt start with a coke zero, but will nod to a half a glass as you've ordered a carrafe. Order nibbles and sit near the front in those little tables for two, rather than in the restaurant, that way she's getting grub with out the formaility of a meal. Hopefully a second bottle will see her dropping the coke zero for a full glass.

    Now you can wonder off for a Xmas looksee at the cov garden buskers and artistes. Don't forget to pick up a £5 nick nack for your brothers kid or some such (demonstrates family comitments and confidence in raising family matters).

    Your news Confident will now be suitable enamoured and aquiece to a last drink before going to the station, I would then steer you to Los Locos which is dark, cheap and a lot of fun. Mention something about your friend recommending it and act surprised that it is so easy to find.

    http://maps.google.com.sg/maps?oe=UTF-8&hl=en-gb&client=safari&um=1&ie=UTF-8&q=covent+garden+restaurants&fb=1&gl=sg&hq=covent+garden+restaurants&hnear=0x31da1767b42b8ec9:0x400f7acaedaa420,Singapore&ei=5obxTpqVC8LWrQe2yqDnDw&sa=X&oi=local_group&ct=image&ved=0CEoQtgM#bmb=1

    It's open til 3 or so.

    Etiquette on the date.

    Don't forget to thank her for coming,
    Don't forget to compliment her
    Don't forget to skip the innuendo on the first date (until you've had sex)
    If she smokes, bin her.
     
    • Like Like x 1
  13. Mr Happy

    Mr Happy LE Moderator

    Excuse spelling am in a predictive text spiral of doom
     
  14. Don't suppose you can suggest similar in Chester? :)