Songs for Being-Stuck-in-the-Back-of-the-Bedford to...

Discussion in 'The Lamp and Sandbag II - The Tall Story Strikes B' started by dannyboyrude, Jan 13, 2006.

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  1. I can only remember one song for singing while being driven to whatever training area we're going to. It goes a little something like this -

    (NB: each line is repeated by the rest of the passengers after being 'sung' by the MC)

    "I've been around town
    Knocking on every door
    Gosh-darn son-of-a-beyatch
    Couldn't find a whore

    Finally found a whore
    She was tall and thin
    Gosh-darn son-of-a-beyatch
    Couldn't get it in

    Finally got it in
    Wiggled it all about
    Gosh-darn son-of-a-beyatch
    Couldn't get it out

    Finally got it out
    It was red and sore
    The moral of the story is -
    Never fcuk a whore!"

    I like this song because it's educational and it rhymes.


    One other song comes from a certain Welsh unit -

    (To the tune of 'Men of Harlech')

    "We're the boys from Aberystwyth
    We're the boys who you get pished with
    We're the boys who'll shag your missus
    Aber company!"

    There're other verses, but no-one could ever agree on the lyrics, so we'd end up singing Bohemian Rhapsody instead...

    Please! Post your songs here! (Especially if you know the one about Yogi bear)
     
  2. i know some one you dont know
    yogi, yogi
    i know some one you dont know
    yogi yogi bear

    yogi yogi bear
    yogi yogi bear
    i know some one you dont know
    yogi yogi bear.(the rest follow this format, sung to the tune of "camp town races"(alla blazin saddles))

    yogis got a girl friend
    cindy, cindy, etc

    cindy dosnt shave her muff
    grizzly, grizzly, etc

    yogi likes it in the snow
    polar, polar, etc

    yogi likes the larger girls
    cuddly, cuddly, etc

    cindys into whips and chains
    kinky, kinky, etc

    yogi likes it in the trees
    koala, koala, etc

    yogis got a little friend
    booboo, booboo, etc

    booboo likes it up his arse
    bender, bender, etc

    yogi likes some chinky muff
    panda, panda, etc

    sometimes yogi has a w@nk
    solo, solo, etc
     
  3. Back of a Bedford? Hmm - how about "....."The trucks don't work...."*




    *Sorry. I'll get off. Get Drives to slow down a bit.
     
  4. The tampax factory.

    You can tell by the smell
    That she isn't very well
    When the end of the month comes around

    You can tell by the taste
    That it isn't salmon paste
    When the end of the month comes around

    Dums dee dums because I can't remember the rest of the words.
     
  5. I like this song because it's educational and it rhymes.

    Arrffffffff....!!
     
  6. "we no like ye british soldier" was always a good one.

    and another one was

    "I used to work in chicago an old department store"

    traditional one,

    "get your t**ts oot for the lads as you passed a young female, good looking was optional not a requirement.
     
  7. assorted macc lads and pogues was generally the order of the day for us.

    still know "Sally Maclannan" and "beer n sex n chips n gravy" off by heart years later
     
  8. What was the one that went along the lines of
    "it wasnt the grass that tickled her ass it was my finger" etc.

    It is one of my life goals to find out!
     
  9. Beer, Sex, Chips n Gravy..... The Macc Lads


    Cleaned my teeth, put on my best clobber,
    Tonight's the night I'm going to knob her
    Vauxhall Viva's covered in rust,
    But you can't shag a bird on a 29 bus

    Beer and sex and chips and gravy, its all a Macc Lad wants
    Beer and sex and chips and gravy, and a tasty bit of clump
    Get up off the floor, finish your chips, we're going to sup some more

    Pulled the bird down the Fox & Grapes
    Game of darts and a lot of beer
    'Can you hold your liquor (licker) love?'
    'Yes I can, always by the ears.'

    (chorus)

    Treat your women like toilets
    They're happy when you're abusing them
    But toilets don't follow you round when you've finished using them

    (chorus)
     
  10. Sung to the tune of Magic Moments
     
  11. "Three German soldiers crossed the Rhine""

    Or

    Wasn't there a song that was sung to the tune of a Trumpton song?

    "You know youre fcuked and you're out of luck
    Bouncing along in an Army truck?"

    :?
     

  12. It wasn't the grass,
    that tickled her ass,
    it was my finger.
    She sat on my face,
    and i guessed her weight.
    She was a minger.
     
  13. Yes to the tune of magic moments, but what are the rest of the lyrics
     
  14. In the shade of the old apple tree
    Where between her fat legs I could see
    A little brown spot
    With the hair in a knot,
    And it certainly looked good to me.

    I asked as I tickled her tit
    If she thought that my big thing would fit.
    She said it would do
    So we had a good screw
    In the shade of the old apple tree.


    In the shade of the old apple tree
    I got all that was coming to me.
    In the soft dewy grass
    I had a fine piece of ass
    From a maiden that was fine to see.


    I could hear the dull buzz of the bee
    As he sunk his grub hooks into me.
    Her ass it was fine
    But you should have seen mine
    In the shade of the old apple tree.
     
  15. Poetry. Nothing less.