So Where The Hell Are They?

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by Rocketeer, May 16, 2007.

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  1. okay, okay.. we've got Girls with Guns, Biker Bbes, others with cycles, draped over cars, wet T-shirting up the place, girls eating and rolling in sh*t, and decked out in Camo/web etc. etc...they come from practically every country in the world and there are apparently thousands and thousands of them scattered all over the interweeb..nublie, fresh, hot babes willing to flaunt titties and clitties and shake their booties..


    where are these women?? I mean, I'm no recluse, I get out ot events, parties, business meetings.. and I've NEVER MET ONE O THEM!!.. I talk to fashionable young women, they tell me they're doctors, lawyers, IT specialists, career counsellors, houswives, hundreds of other professions but not one ever said to me " Oh, I pose naked on the internet."

    I mean, its not as if they could be embarrassed or shy, afterall they're bare assed nekkid visible for the whole damn world to download.. some may be exploited by the Russian mob, or eastern drug lords, but, damn!! the majority must be pulling in a more than a few bucks from the basement w@nkers about the globe..

    So how come I've never met any? Has any ARRSER?? I'm sure if Kathy West was at a get together, she wouldn't say she was a stock/commodities day trader when asked what she does..would she??


    okay.. okay.. the meds are kicking in..sorry for this.

    but, any of you met women who admit to being lusted after on keyboards around the globe? just curious is all..
  2. There's a couple of them chained up in my cellar.
  3. Yes, we had a temp at work who announced to us all that she was a porn model. I actually saw some of her photos a couple of months later, and she looked much better in them than she did in real life (apart from the really dodgy wig she was wearing in the photos).
  4. Buddy of mine was having a drink at a local with me when he spotted a fetching fem at the rail.. He stared for a few minutes then went up to her and said.." Didn't I see you naked on the internet? " needless to say he limped home singing soprano that night.. not so sure he was mistaken, though..she did look familiar...
  5. Someone I know is friends with Cathy Barry, that's about it.
  6. A female friend I grew up with was a producer with Television X for a while. I turned down their 10th year anniversary party at a club in Mayfair to get a pint with my sister. It was Fosters I think. I'm fairly sure there would have been some 'actors and actresses' there though, so they do exist.
  7. Much as I'd love to believe that there's a distinct lack of airbrushing (or its video/DVD equivalent) a lot of pr0n stars don't seem to be in particularly sharp focus...not suggesting for a second that they're munters however :)
  8. Even if only 1 in every 10,000 women became a porn actress or glamour model, there would still be 3,000 in this country, enough to make it seem that there is a never-ending supply of porn stars in the UK alone. The population of the world is 6,000,000,000 which means that if 1 in 10,000 women world-wide went into porn there would be 300,000 in total. More than enough to clog up the internet with filth and stop you from seeing the same models over and over again (unless you really wanted to) and give the overwhelming impression that all women are filthy sluts.

    I've always considered it remarkable that, although women prepared to have sex on camera for public viewing are quit rare and scat sex is a very rare activity, there are sufficient women prepared to eat sh1t and dump on each other on film to make it a profitable industry!
  9. :p I met sam janus once, i was at a promotional do when i was a civvie and met her face to face, like a gibbering twat all i could say was hi. She just smiled and laughed and walked by.

    Most of the fit birds are in hollyoaks then when they finish filming they let the dogs go and lock the rest away

    My theory is all the fit birds were rounded up and sent to a secret island somwhere, then there bought out when needed, and then put straight back before we get a chance to kick their back doors in.

    You could alwys try project girlfriend, find a good looking fat bird then beast the shit out of her till shes slim and bingo.
  10. You've not met my doris, then? :lol:
  11. Had a drink with a bird that was in porn mags. But she was about as attractive as a bulldog chewing a wasp.
    Met a few of the girls from Max Power/FHM etc, got to dance with a few of them. they didnt like being groped though really :D.
    But on the whole, im sure attractive birds are kept hidden away, and then paired up with the ugliest blokes imaginable before they are released.
  12. There's always the divine Katie Derham on ITV.

    Or Fiona Bruce.

    Or Andrea Catherwood.

    Probably in that order of w@anktitude . . . . . .

    Like a traffic-light/bikini alert.
  13. They're here:
    You can even search by county and confirm the ones you saw down the club are at it.

    The things you find when you're researching news stories! Seriously!
  14. i think the real reason that we rarely see top models or porn stars is they can earn a few grand per movie and are generally better off than you average pte or cpl so tend not to go to pubs like the black swan or kings arms and definately wouldnt be seen dead in the usual sticky floored dive that i frequented when i was single, And if you want to meet beautiful women just drink more thats what beer goggles are for