Slimmer of the Year downs 18 cans of coke a day

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by re-stilly, Nov 24, 2011.

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  1. OK it was a little exaggeration, but it is Diet Coke.

    A man has told how a lifelong addiction to Diet Coke has come to dominate his life.
    Darren Jones, 38, can't go a day without downing 18 cans of the soft drink - the equivalent of 42 litres a week, costing him around £3,000 a year.

    Linky to Hate mail

  2. cloudbuster

    cloudbuster Guest

    Good use of imagination.

    Frankly, I'm not worried he'll become a bigger burden on the NHS; the way he's expanding he'll be doing a Mr. Creosote sometime before Christmas.
  3. My kids came home recently with some litmus paper to test the ph values of various household liquids for a school project. Diet Coke has the same ph level as vinegar and lemon juice. Forty two litres of acid a week - what must that be doing to his guts.
  4. Shaolinpunk

    Shaolinpunk Old-Salt

    I bet the fat cunt will sue Coca-Cola company under trade descriptions, the diet coke really worked out for him!
    • Like Like x 1
  5. Top_Crab

    Top_Crab Old-Salt

    Coke is bad, but not as bad as HP sauce, try it on a coin (Not a valuable one) it will eat into it. Take my advice & go tomato ketchup, unless you want to fart like a trooper.
  6. goatrutar

    goatrutar Guest

    42 litres of HP sauce?
  7. What a fat useless waste of oxygen.

    It's funny how these idiots always claim it's not their fault. he can f*ck off and die for all I care. After all, nobody is forcing him to drink it.

    Anyway, diet drinks are for fat bastards...

    • Like Like x 1
  8. If he stuck to Lidl own brand he could save a fortune.
    (Does his "addiction" qualify him for benefits?)
  9. cloudbuster

    cloudbuster Guest

    He needs to get one of these;
  10. viceroy

    viceroy LE

    I can see the 'Diet' really does work on him. Imagine the size of him if he'd drink classic coke...

    Candidate for the darwin awards?
  11. What's the fuss? Most days I drink about 18 cans of bock.
  12. Soda Stream Cola was worse than River Cola, which was actually just river.
  13. The fat cunt needs a few grams of the powder variety up his hooter every day that'll shift some weight
  14. whats it doing to his guts !? ... obviously its expanding them dummy !!
  15. techno-spastic

    techno-spastic RIP RIP

    No, what he needs to get is a LASM fired up his hoop...

    Edit: The fat cunt!