Silly injuries sustained and there implications......

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by Salford-Vera, Nov 24, 2007.

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  1. right im bored and in work, ive just had to complete a referral for one of my clients and it comes more apparent every day that whilst typing i have the mis-fortune of not being able to feel the keys due to an accident in which whist drying a wine glass, i snapped it at the stem and it went through my wrist cutting the nerves to 3 of my fingers and the palm of my hand! I therefore have no feeling in said parts even after having surgery.

    Im aware that it is a womans job to do the dishes etc but i had opened a cheeky 3rd bottle when she went to bed so please dont comment on "i shouldnt have been in the kitchen in the first place".

    So the question is, what injuries have you sustained doing mundane tasks and what implications have they had on you.

    Ive also sustained a few other injuries but i'll tell ya later.
  2. One last run at the skate ramp, a week before attestation.

    A stupid mistake meant I landed hard on the concrete from about 8 foot up in the air.

    1 x Broken arm and an extra 3 month wait before I could start my basic training, which led to a wait of over a year for my trade course as I just missed the previous one.

    I signed on the dotted line in December 2000 and finally joined my regiment as a fullly trained tradesman in October 2003!

    Purely because I wanted to show off just once more!
  3. Snapped my jap string a few years ago, pain was immense.

    Bit the bullet and went to the doctor, sods law female doctor

    Doc: "How did this happen Mr MAD FERRET?"

    Me: "I was hosing some lass and missed whilst ricocheting her round the room...."

    Dont know who was more embarressed..
  4. Ive also cut out a knuckle in the my left hand whilst attempting to saw a V into a piece of wood. I still to this day dont know why i was sawing the wood in the first fookin place, unluckily for me the injury to my nerves happened after this injury, therefore resulting in much pain as i still had feeling.

    Lifes a tvvat at times.
  5. Few scoops too many (a few years ago) and headed to the toilet barefoot...kicked the door-jamb by accident. Sat on bog contemplating infinity and looked down to see little toe sitting at 90 degree angle to the foot! Implications were I couldn't get any shoes on for a couple of days after it was reset so had to go to the pub in slippers!! Also, at around the same time, pished up for a change decided, at a party, to try and limbo under a pole (as you do). Went backwards and snapped tendons in my ankle; when asked by the casualty clerk for my occupation I don't think she was too impressed with the answer "trainee limbo dancer"! :oops:
  6. Friend of mine mid thrust managed to do himself a similar injury but instead of snapping his banjo string ripped out a part of his c0ck.
  7. Did she have a vagina like a Lamprey Eel??