Guys I remember way back in 1981 I broke my Fibula & Tibia playing Football for the Bn. (In plaster for 8 months and on crutches for 11) Anyway I missed out on an overseas trip with the Bn so I was sent home on sick leave for the duration 7 weeks. Bn come home and I am beckoned back to London. Arrive back and I am met by my Pln Sgt who tells me I am on the âGate and canteenâ (Cannot Leave Camp or go to the NAAFI for a drink) as I am on the sick and have to be in bed by 10:30 (Which would be verified by the Piquet Sgt checking in on me) Wonderful. Next morning I have to attend Sick Parade to go to see the Medical Officer just to verify I am not bluffing my case (As most soldierâs break their legs just to get out of doing some work) I dually get ready for parade (At 07:30) Bull my shoes yes shoes, I had to take along my Right Shoe to show it had been Bulled (The one I cannot get on because of the plaster, this mucked about with uniformity or something) There must have been about 12 soldierâs on parade awaiting to be inspected, by the Duty Warrant Officer. As he approaches the Piquet Sgt brings us all up to attention, I was allowed just to pull my left foot in to the position of attention as I was on crutches (There all heart) As the Warrant Officer inspects each soldier individually and asking them what was their ailment was and he was greeted by the usual responses. â Iâve got the flu Surâ âIâve been sick all night Surâ or Iâve got a Sare(Sore) Heid (Head) Surâ and he would give the box standard reply/insult_ âWnaker,â âTosser,â âWaste of Space,â He is almost at my position and I am thinking to myself no way is this man going to ask me what is wrong with me, this man is a Warrant Officer Class Two in my Regiment. Surely he can see my âPotâ as I have had to cut my Barrack dress trousers to get over the Pot, come on anyone with one Ineeba Brain Cell could see this. He gets to me and he states âWhat the Fcuk is wrong with you ?â Fcukin Bingo Well my comic side slapped my military side straight in the Gob and I answered âSur I fell on my Back and broke my Noseâ. Well there was a deafening silence for all of a Nano Second and then he screamed Fcukin Lock Him Up Piquet Sgt, Double Him Away to the Guardroomâ Double me away? Christ I could hardly walk never mind double. But the Duty Dcik did as he was told there was the Duff Deit Duff Deit as I hobbled off to the Nick. As they say Happy Days ( I enjoyed the Military that much I stayed for 23 years) Aye Magic Anyone else have a sick parade story?