Should UK have a Darwin Award ?

Discussion in 'The Intelligence Cell' started by BounceBanana, May 4, 2013.

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  1. After the Japanese Tsunami then Energy Minister Chris Huhne ordered inquiry and report by Dr Weightman Head of Nuclear Inspectorate. To report and make recommendations for UK nuclear safety and security.

    I would emphasise the responsibility shouldered by Dr Weightman like this. If he gets it wrong the UK might have to be evacuated for centuries on nuclear set aside.

    My contribution to this was to copy to Dr Weightman, by invitation, a report I had written some years before.

    A backup generator system is electronically controlled. To detect mains failures and to control switching to supply emergency circuitry. And to auto start and run the diesel genny.

    They are vital in roles like hospitals, research facilities (like Porton Down to maintain containments of nasty biologicals etc) and for nuclear emergency shut downs.

    So how is the control electronics made ?

    It emerges from the factory on a system bearing a BSI kitemark. But the fact is BSI (like any other quality regime) does not apply to the factory supply chain.

    In this case the company sub contracts its electronics assembly to a small company on a nearby industrial estate. They are not a quality accredited company.

    But once a week a blonde lady arrives there in a Range Rover and collects boxes of assembly outwork to distribute to homeworkers (With names like Minnie Mouse and Margaret Thatcher) who earn about 50 pence an hour to top up or "Fiddle" their benefits.

    The assembly is not in a static protected environment. But having said that the benefits fiddler stage is the most reliable stage of electronics assembly on its way to protect the existence of the Realm.

    It then passes into the factory and is assembled there by a disaffected workforce grubbing along at National Minimum wage level of existence.

    The IEE reported that 93% of managers in our electrical industry are unqualified. This company exceeds the trend by having 100% unqualified managers.

    The directors concern themselves only with protecting market share.

    The politicians too because as UK companies are sued in overseas courts they too see a need to protect market share from further revelations of UK companies falling short of standards and falsifying test records.

    As happened with our torpedoes (See Belgrano Falklands having to be attacked by torps designed first in 1923)

    I don't suppose the dole fiddlers of Thanet who were making fifty pence an hour will be given any medals for being the least sorry link in the chain.

    But they appear to have voted UKIP this week. Perhaps recognising the need to get back to what used to be called British Standards ?
  2. I consider myself to be a fairly intelligent bloke. I can solve a puzzle as well as the next man.

    I'm finding myself a bit stumped though - what's your point exactly?
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  3. Like a normal manager, but not fictional
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  4. Probably one with a former career in the kent police firearms unit.
  5. If I was in charge of the Ministry of Really Important Things, then ArRSe is where I'd come for help with my homework.

    Have a medal
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  6. He has no point, he is infact pointless.
  7. FFS, Zero, it's BounceBanana, nothing he posts makes sense or has a point!!
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  8. It's just another ramble.

    Without the stout shoes.

    Or a stick.
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  9. If you'd be the first winner, I'm sure it's an idea that most sensible people would get behind.
  10. The late Derbyshire burglar was the first winner. See appropriate threads.
  11. Thank **** for that I thought I was going mental.
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  12. Theres mental and then there is Bouncebanana mental, he's a fruitloop extraordinaire.
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  13. It made sense to me. Does that make me odd?

    How relevant BB's report from "some years before", on the reliability of control electronics, is something we'll never know.

    I had a job once that involved updating the schedules for power-supplies from emergency generators for a very big company. very tedious it was, revised every month. Someone noticed the generators had very few hours on the clock which didn't correllate with the maintenance records, so they fired them up. Well, tried to; they were all seized.

    I think the issue with the Japanese emergency cooling systems and stand-by generators was that they didn't perform very well when submerged in salt water, rather than the reliability of the electronic controllers.

    How could you construct a fail-safe cooling system? Gravity feed open-circuit from hill-top reservoirs, via aqueducts or pipelines? Closed circuit, pumps driven by turbines powered by hill-top reservoirs? Digital programmable pneumatic logic controllers?

    I haven't got the foggiest.