short marriage divorce

charleymouse

Old-Salt
Short Marriage Divorce

Hi. Ex-Stab with 12 years in, now early 50's. I married a Thai lady in 2013 that I,d met over there whilst teaching English.
I sorted out a visa for her and we pitched up in a seaside town in Yorkshire, where I bought a guest house for us to run together.
She then went and took a full time job cleaning in the town leaving me to run it. We had a number of arguments about money, even though we were doing ok. I gave her a couple of lump sums amounting to 20k since we married.

She had me nicked in 2017, saying I'd assaulted her after another money argument where I tried to walk away but wasn,t allowed to. Refused a caution, got some Commuinity Service hours. Shes now got legal aid. She wanted mediation, I returned a form 2 days late or something, then tried to restart and shes not having it. I have a brief. She says short marriage 2013-2017, no kids 10k-20k. Her E form arrived last week her solicitor says 150K (I have another house BTL, mortgage free on both properties). I have no pension.

Is this like a bidding process with the briefs until we get to court or how is it? None of the good things Ive done have been mentioned, just what an animal I am for peeling her off of me, when she had me by the lapels. Any advice or opinions appreciated,
 

Cold_Collation

LE
Book Reviewer
Not sure exactly what your query is. First question is: has it formally been declared a short marriage? If so, there's no lower floor on what people can be awarded (at least, that was the case when I got divorced). Also, there's no formal length of constitutes a short marriage. It's open to the judge's interpretation.

You might want to make some counter-claims about behaviour - or, at least, challenge her version(s). There can be punitive awards made for poor behaviour.

But your post is unclear: is she saying that you should only get £10-20k, and that her solicitor says she's due £150k?
 

charleymouse

Old-Salt
Not sure exactly what your query is. First question is: has it formally been declared a short marriage? If so, there's no lower floor on what people can be awarded (at least, that was the case when I got divorced). Also, there's no formal length of constitutes a short marriage. It's open to the judge's interpretation.

You might want to make some counter-claims about behaviour - or, at least, challenge her version(s). There can be punitive awards made for poor behaviour.

But your post is unclear: is she saying that you should only get £10-20k, and that her solicitor says she's due £150k?

sorry, my unclear. My solicitor (woman) reckons 10-20k is fair. Her solicitor has put down on the Finances form that she wants 150k. It hasnt been declared a short marriage yet. We go to court next month, but that is what my brief has said to me.
 

wheel

LE
Short Marriage Divorce

Hi. Ex-Stab with 12 years in, now early 50's. I married a Thai lady in 2013 that I,d met over there whilst teaching English.
I sorted out a visa for her and we pitched up in a seaside town in Yorkshire, where I bought a guest house for us to run together.
She then went and took a full time job cleaning in the town leaving me to run it. We had a number of arguments about money, even though we were doing ok. I gave her a couple of lump sums amounting to 20k since we married.

She had me nicked in 2017, saying I'd assaulted her after another money argument where I tried to walk away but wasn,t allowed to. Refused a caution, got some Commuinity Service hours. Shes now got legal aid. She wanted mediation, I returned a form 2 days late or something, then tried to restart and shes not having it. I have a brief. She says short marriage 2013-2017, no kids 10k-20k. Her E form arrived last week her solicitor says 150K (I have another house BTL, mortgage free on both properties). I have no pension.

Is this like a bidding process with the briefs until we get to court or how is it? None of the good things Ive done have been mentioned, just what an animal I am for peeling her off of me, when she had me by the lapels. Any advice or opinions appreciated,
You have been stitched like a kipper.
 

Cold_Collation

LE
Book Reviewer
sorry, my unclear. My solicitor (woman) reckons 10-20k is fair. Her solicitor has put down on the Finances form that she wants 150k. It hasnt been declared a short marriage yet. We go to court next month, but that is what my brief has said to me.
OK. Well, if it's a short marriage there's no floor as to what she can get. If it's NOT a short marriage, that's a different matter. There's no connection between divorce and financial settlement - in other words, it doesn't have to happen immediately upon divorce. It's possibly worth waiting for that decision before getting into the hard bargaining.

She can want all she wants but from the point of declaration of assets, there's a series of up to three hearings.

Basically, what happens is that the judge asks at the first one if you've reached an agreement. If you have, great. If not, you'll get a mild warning that the two people either side of you (the legal people) are costing you money. If there's a second hearing, the same happens, with a slightly sterner warning about costs if you've not reached a conclusion. If it goes to a third hearing, the judge will decide for you based on a number of factors including relative financial contribution and, to a degree good/bad behaviour.

Short marriage = no floor. Not a short marriage = minimum of 30 percent of assets.
 
What's her immigration status?
May be worth having a word with the immigration people if there's a chance yo could get her deported.
 
Moral of this story: When in Thailand, stick to the scenery and culture!

One thing that puzzled me was why it was necessary for the OP to pay his wife two lump sums totalling £20,000?
 
Moral of this story: When in Thailand, stick to the scenery and culture!

One thing that puzzled me was why it was necessary for the OP to pay his wife two lump sums totalling £20,000?
Think they were gifts when times were better, he’s just making a point I believe.
 

charleymouse

Old-Salt
Moral of this story: When in Thailand, stick to the scenery and culture!

One thing that puzzled me was why it was necessary for the OP to pay his wife two lump sums totalling £20,000?
I cleared her debts before she came over. And 18 months in she threatened to leave me as everything is in my name & she wanted some financial security. Would I play it that way again? Probably not.
 
I cleared her debts before she came over. And 18 months in she threatened to leave me as everything is in my name & she wanted some financial security. Would I play it that way again? Probably not.
I had the exact same happen with clearing the debts and then dealing with pissyness as all assets were in my name, not a fun fight. At the time it’s a blind trust issue that can turn out great, or really sück, apparently I opted for the sück option......
 
I cleared her debts before she came over. And 18 months in she threatened to leave me as everything is in my name & she wanted some financial security. Would I play it that way again? Probably not.
No. It’s crappy but that was probably the time to read the signs and get rid. She sounds like a piece of work.
 

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