Sheila and Bruce

Discussion in 'Blue Jokes' started by Welshexpat, Sep 13, 2010.

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  1. Sheila is getting out of the shower - slips and lands on the wet tiles in the splits - she's suctioned herself to the tiles and can't get up. (Read in your best Aussie accent please)

    "BRUCE - BRUCE MATE get your arse up here - I've suctioned meself to the floor mate"

    Bruce dashes up - sure enough, there's Sheila, legs akimbo, can't move.

    He tries lifting her from under her arms - no deal - so he dashes out to the shed and gets a paddle - tries to scoop her off the tiles - no deal.

    "Hang on Sheila - I'll go and get me mate - Bruce"

    So Bruce and Bruce return, scratching their heads and saying "Jeeze Mate"

    Suddenly Bruce has an idea "Tell you what Bruce"

    "What's that Bruce?" says Bruce

    "I'll go and get me toolbox - we can smash the tiles around her, lift her up, flip her over and peel away the bits that way"

    "Ah - good idea mate" says Bruce "OK you go and get your toolbox and I'll play with her nipples"

    "What you want to do that for Bruce?"

    "Well" says Bruce "If I can make her moist enough, we can slide her out into the corridor - cheaper tiles there mate"