She Who Must Be Obeyed

[MoleBath]

1 ADSR, early 2000’s, car pulls up at the Main Gate. The Guard have been given specific instructions from the RSM that they are to check every single ID card of every vehicle entering camp. (As told to me by the guys on guard that date)
Wife Of pulls up to the gate.
“Good morning Ma’am, could I see your ID card please?”
“I’m the TOTs wife”
“Yes we know that Ma’am, but we have instructions from the RSM to check every ID card of people entering camp”
“You can see by my car pass that I’m the TOTs wife now let me in”
”Sorry Ma’am, you’re not allowed entry onto camp unless you show me your ID card”
“I’m the TOTs wife, and I demand you let me in “
“Only if you show me your ID card”
“Right, I want to speak to the Guard Commander”
She then storms in to the Guardroom, shouting and screaming about being the TOTs wife demanding entry and wanting the guard jailed for being impertinent.
Guard Commander (who had been watching it all from the window) “Good morning Ma’am, could I see your ID card please?”
To cut a long story short, she threatened to jail all the guard, her husband was going to come down and charge everyone, she was the TOTs wife and demanded entry. Guard Commander who got bored of her rants “ Why are you talking in that posh accent Ma’am? You married your husband when he was a full screw”
She goes purple and storms off home, no ID no entry.
Some of you will know her and her equally full of himself excuse for a man Capt Pxxxy (a perfect example of why RSignals techs shouldn’t have got accelerated promotion, he was widely mocked by all the Div staff and the Regtl Officers. Always had to have the last word on Commanders Conferences)

Royal Signals. Uses plan to bolster rather poor profile by incorporating term J6 everywhere. J6 becomes hugely important without anyone knowing why. J6 reps with J6 plan appear everywhere but stay strangely silent during any meaningful discussion. If questioned J6 rep sucks teeth and says Bandwidth before sinking back into silence. Non-J6 types begin to wonder whether weedkiller can halt J6 spread, but J6 mutates into J6/DBM and grows faster. Plan stays silent and prevents close scrutiny by exuding streams of 1s and 0s to deter investigation.

 

[greenbaggyskin]

Royal Signals. Uses plan to bolster rather poor profile by incorporating term J6 everywhere. J6 becomes hugely important without anyone knowing why. J6 reps with J6 plan appear everywhere but stay strangely silent during any meaningful discussion. If questioned J6 rep sucks teeth and says Bandwidth before sinking back into silence. Non-J6 types begin to wonder whether weedkiller can halt J6 spread, but J6 mutates into J6/DBM and grows faster. Plan stays silent and prevents close scrutiny by exuding streams of 1s and 0s to deter investigation.

Bit strange! Are you ok?

 

[Silksheen]

My brother did a tour at Scampton many years ago, some of the Reds wives were way, way above themselves according to him.

Apparently stopping at the gate when instructed did not apply to them. Back then they had a sponsorship deal with Rover and the pilots all had a Rover saloon in the nearest shade to Dead Sparrow red. They would genuinely refer to them as "Fast Reds" for some reason. Wives would frequently just floor it after turning off the A15 and head for their patch. After one wife had almost taken out the guard, my brother was on the barrier and just got out of the way, she then decided to stop, reverse back, and chastise said armed guard for not getting out of her way because "everyone knows these are Red Arrows Rovers". She was promptly dragged out of her "fast red", informed that other people drove Red Rovers like that as well, and introduced to the guardroom while repeating that her husband "was a Red Arrow don't you know."

All swept under the carpet though.

Must have been bad there, he has a hatred of the Reds that survives to this day.

 

[PapaGolf]

OK, let's put it this way. If Mrs P did behave that way, she had undergone a massive character transplant since 2002, when the pair of them were well within our social circle. We've been ski-ing together for weeks at a time, spent loads of time in each others' company and always went to the mess together. I just cannot give this tale any credence whatsoever.

Funny story about him though. During SAIF SARREA II, in 2001, we foremen had a secret 'engineering' laptop that we could use to send e-mails, browse t'internet and so on. Unfortunately it wasn't the best laptop and, with all the sand, the keys started to stick if you didn't give them some definite pressure. One day, my wife called me on Ptarmigan, through the cleverly set-up bridge we had put in place, to tell me that his wife, C****, had phoned her in tears telling her that her husband had sent her a message, "I can live without you!" She was devastated and my wife asked me to speak to him to see what had brought him to this conclusion. Was it the separation, was it 9/11 (Which had just happened), was it something else? I found him over in the Joint HQ tent and took him outside for a quick chat. His face dropped and his eyes turned to dinner plates. "Shit! That bloody 'T' key! I meant to write I can't live without you!"

Oh how we laughed.

I don’t doubt it. People can behave differently when they think they aren’t being watched by their circle. All I’ve done here is take the original message passed and ‘relay through me’.
My personal experience of him is that he was curt and abrasive, and his manner to others of even Warrant Officer level was arrogant and rude. Perhaps he was having a series of bad days, or perhaps he behaved like that to everyone outside of the tech clique. Officers, Warrant Officers and Seniors NCOs all had the same individually formed opinion of him. I saw that for myself. May not even be the same guy

 

[PapaGolf]

Royal Signals. Uses plan to bolster rather poor profile by incorporating term J6 everywhere. J6 becomes hugely important without anyone knowing why. J6 reps with J6 plan appear everywhere but stay strangely silent during any meaningful discussion. If questioned J6 rep sucks teeth and says Bandwidth before sinking back into silence. Non-J6 types begin to wonder whether weedkiller can halt J6 spread, but J6 mutates into J6/DBM and grows faster. Plan stays silent and prevents close scrutiny by exuding streams of 1s and 0s to deter investigation.

Does your carer know you’re here?

 

[Kroneit44]

I don’t doubt it. People can behave differently when they think they aren’t being watched by their circle. All I’ve done here is take the original message passed and ‘relay through me’.
My personal experience of him is that he was curt and abrasive, and his manner to others of even Warrant Officer level was arrogant and rude. Perhaps he was having a series of bad days, or perhaps he behaved like that to everyone outside of the tech clique. Officers, Warrant Officers and Seniors NCOs all had the same individually formed opinion of him. I saw that for myself. May not even be the same guy

I wonder if he ever spoke to Gig like that...more than once?

 

[PapaGolf]

Very unlikely. Or Barry the Bastard!

 

[greenbaggyskin]

I don’t doubt it. People can behave differently when they think they aren’t being watched by their circle. All I’ve done here is take the original message passed and ‘relay through me’.
My personal experience of him is that he was curt and abrasive, and his manner to others of even Warrant Officer level was arrogant and rude. Perhaps he was having a series of bad days, or perhaps he behaved like that to everyone outside of the tech clique. Officers, Warrant Officers and Seniors NCOs all had the same individually formed opinion of him. I saw that for myself. May not even be the same guy

I'm talking about his wife, not him.

 

[MoleBath]

Bit strange! Are you ok?

As for us Gunners , equally unflattering....
Artillery. Also likes plans. Makes very detailed plans, with numbers, timings and smoke. Talks a lot about HE, smoke and last safe moments. Everyone recognises last safe moment was passed as soon as Gunners allowed anywhere near plan. Despite plan all guns just keep firing until ammo runs out. Commanders lucky enough not to have Artillery support feel safe enough to get on with battle and win. Remainder hide under map table until firing ceases then call for ambulances. After firing Gunner officers check all guns are still pointing roughly in the direction of the enemy. Random shots rearward are put down as encouragement to log chain to bring up more ammo.

 

[PapaGolf]

I'm talking about his wife, not him.