Shameful Celebrity Crush?

#1
My current list:

William Petersen, aka Gil Grissom of CSI Vegas. Old enough to be... well at least my older brother, and I still would.

Rhys Iffffff-vans or whatever his bloody name is. He looks like the offspring of a village idiot and a bag of pipe cleaners, he's Welsh, he has horrendous teeth and for some reason, I'd still have a crack at him.

Duncan Ballantyne - This one I do understand. He looks and sounds like a slightly older Mr Borgia, but has a considerably larger bank balance and probably a far lower propensity for rounding up the stray squaddies on his barracks on Saturday afternoons like some sort of paternally frustrated Collie and insisting I cook dinner for them while they block my hallway with boots, shout obscenities at the X-box/rugby/football/F1/women's beach volleyball, smoke all my cigarettes and stub them out in my plant-pots, decimate the contents of the beer fridge and drinks cabinet and..... Ahem. Ranting is such an unattractive habit, I do apologise.

Anyway... Which S'lebbritty types out there you are ashamed to say you would be inclined to mount, given half a chance?
 
#2
Carol the weather girl from BBC News.
 

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#5
I'm pretty sure we already have a very popular and successful thread about this called 'Women you fancy but shouldn't' or some such.

But since you asked, I would bum the shit out of that Asian bird from the One Show despite her massive, out of proportion, lollipop head.
 
#6
The little chubby one from Little Mix. She resembles a shaved Ewok but I still want to spit up her arse till her teeth drown.
 
#8
I'm pretty sure we already have a very popular and successful thread about this called 'Women you fancy but shouldn't' or some such.

But since you asked, I would bum the shit out of that Asian bird from the One Show despite her massive, out of proportion, lollipop head.
Bugger - sorry, didn't spot that one.

And do you mean Myleene Klass?
 
#9
My current list:

William Petersen, aka Gil Grissom of CSI Vegas. Old enough to be... well at least my older brother, and I still would.

Rhys Iffffff-vans or whatever his bloody name is. He looks like the offspring of a village idiot and a bag of pipe cleaners, he's Welsh, he has horrendous teeth and for some reason, I'd still have a crack at him.

Duncan Ballantyne - This one I do understand. He looks and sounds like a slightly older Mr Borgia, but has a considerably larger bank balance and probably a far lower propensity for rounding up the stray squaddies on his barracks on Saturday afternoons like some sort of paternally frustrated Collie and insisting I cook dinner for them while they block my hallway with boots, shout obscenities at the X-box/rugby/football/F1/women's beach volleyball, smoke all my cigarettes and stub them out in my plant-pots, decimate the contents of the beer fridge and drinks cabinet and..... Ahem. Ranting is such an unattractive habit, I do apologise.

Anyway... Which S'lebbritty types out there you are ashamed to say you would be inclined to mount, given half a chance?
Not so sure that would be the case with Duncan...he was court marshalled out of the Navy, so would probably enjoy the company of matelots/squaddies and have a bloody good pi55 up, only thing is, the price of the contents in his beer fridge would pay off my mortgage.... probably
 
R

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#12
When I was a sprog-Selina Scott, and blonde one from abba (girl).
Nowadays-Bradbury, of course, goes without saying.
 
#15
Not so sure that would be the case with Duncan...he was court marshalled out of the Navy, so would probably enjoy the company of matelots/squaddies and have a bloody good pi55 up, only thing is, the price of the contents in his beer fridge would pay off my mortgage.... probably
Bugger.

Ah well. It's not as though I mind that much. The next one who thinks it's amusing to call me "Mum", however, will have a unenviable understanding of the symptoms of arsenic poisoning.
 
#16
Hippo fancier, HC?
Although I'm handsomer than a handsome thing I like the rough and tumble sex you generally only get from the coloured sisters, especially big buck niggers who like to bite and scratch. There's one in a well known Manchester brass cafe who I go see, I take her a pair of new tights, black, (Boots own brand) and she let's me eat her out through them (I like that you see), for the encore I tear a hole in said tights and knob it for about 10 seconds before unbolting, mega for £65.

Anyway, Fizz from Corrie would get it.
 
R

renamed_user

Guest
#17
Theresa May the current Home Secretary,also strangely enough one her predecessors and even though I despise her, Jackie Smith.
Thinking of these two always makes me click onto the "Village ladies" website.
 
#18
£65 for a pair of tights is a bit steep. Concur with Fizz, although she is a bit young for me.
 

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