Sh1tfaced student in python syphon shocker

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by Ancient_Mariner, Oct 5, 2010.

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  1. It's that time of year again. Schoolkids become adults as they move out and go to Uni. It's good to have a checklist:-

    Program new iphone with every fast food delivery restaurant within 5 miles of digs - CHECK

    Obtain train timetable so I can come home every single weekend - CHECK

    Join Labour party - CHECK

    Mummy to slip packet of condoms into my luggage "without my knowledge" - CHECK (BUT WHY ON EARTH ARE THEY FRUIT FLAVOURED?)

    Daddy to get me a credit card "just in case" - CHECK

    Locate nearest war memorial so I can swamp on it while pi$$ed during fresher's week - CHECK

    Yes folks, another University town. Another fresher's week pi$$ up organised by Carnage UK (remember them from last year's outrage in Sheffield?). Another war memorial used as a toilet.

    Student pictured urinating on city cenotaph subject of police investigation - Telegraph

    Am I being naive or could this problem be cured very simply by a Judge uttering the phrase "You will go to prison for five years"?
  2. Am I being naive or could this problem be cured very simply by a Judge uttering the phrase "You will go to prison for five years"?[/QUOTE]

    Sorry to say this, but the answer's probably "yes" on both counts. It's yuman rites innit!?
  3. The Universities concerned would be quite within their rights to expel students for bringing them into disrepute.

    Assuming it's Southampton University, their Student Discipline Regulations say:

    Unfortunately, in reality it's almost impossible to actually exclude a student unless they're convicted of a criminal offence which carries a jail term.
  4. We may not have weed on a memorial,but come along chaps,admit it,we certainly were not saints,we are just older and a little miffed we can't do it anymore like we used to!
  5. Maybe the answer is to start issuing fines to Carnage UK?
  6. Or force them to employ SIA badged escorts to ensure the little darlings don't go astray. As soon as it starts hitting them in the pocket Carnage UK will have to sort out the problem.
  7. That is my way of thinking. They are the responible party and should be held responsible.
  8. Or make them responsible for the cost of adequately policing their "events". Football clubs have to pay for extra policing on match days, why not this lot.

    Can there be any truth in the rumour, started by me, that the RBL (REME Division) are wiring up war memorials to the mains?
  9. No matter how pissed i've been i've never pissed on a war memorial. The parents need to get a grip and instill some discipline but unfortunately Labour banned that.
  10. Carnage night in Cheltenham today I think.
  11. TheIronDuke

    TheIronDuke LE Book Reviewer

    Fuck me. I've been so pissed I have probabally pissed upon a stuffed wombat in the British Museum. I dont know. I was pissed.

    Unless something has escaped me (I was maybe pissed?) this is the whole point of being pissed?

    The odd pissed up kid pisses upon a war memorial? It'll wash off in the next rain and, I dare to suggest, that the Glorious Dead might just snigger. Particularly if they were WW1 working class victims looking down on a badly dressed kid who's worse crime as going for the Trebs For A Quid on his first night away from Mummy and Daddy.

    The guys with their name on the memorial might have had worse experiences than getting pissed and making an arse of yourself.

    Theres badder things to get up about in my view.

    Worse things happen at sea, after all.
  12. You mean people WEE in the sea??.... no...f ucking....way... I feel sick.
  13. TheIronDuke

    TheIronDuke LE Book Reviewer

    But not the seas that contain our Glorious Dead. Other seas. What dont. Right?
  14. Are they fuck responsible, the students are over the age of 18, they are responsible for themselves.
  15. If there isn't, then there should be.

    Fine both the oaves and Carnage, just for good measure.