sh1t went down at the club last night, muscles saved my life

Discussion in 'The ARRSE Hole' started by mrangry, Nov 1, 2008.

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  1. So last night me n the crew r scanning the club, we run securtity on every door in town, ran the old pussies outta town, aint seem em since. had the usuial drunk assed preppy f@gs from the local college, simple choke hold, knee, punch and they are down then we throw them into a dumpster ion the alleyway, one night we puyt 8 guys in it at once, squashed em in like tuna in a can.

    im working the door, crowds are lovin it, seeing me, im a damn celebrity oin this town, im like "chill the **** out" but these guys are shoving n sh1t trying to get a glimpse of my strong assed self especially since im rockin a fine italian suit, really shows off my frame,m

    Peoiple r texting each other n sh1t, soon musta been 1000 outside the club taking pictures begging to get in, guys start shoving some girlsz and the crews like "**** this" and jump in, start nailing people uypside the head, i break out the bats we keep behind the door, cracking skulls all over the ****ing place. women love this sh1t, im top dog and they cant get enough of me whoopin ass,, im givin them a glimpse of my strong ass face inbetween swings of the blood soaked bat, its like a goddamn photo shoot.

    next thing i know some pussy draws a gun, little T makes a grab and gets hit, good thing the crew wear bullet proof vests, i dont, i aint got time for that pussy sh1t, so i go for the guy with a "son, somebody about to get their sh1t messed up" look on my face i see a flash but dont feel sh1t since im jacked up with adrenaline, i tackle this guy and the crew goes to work on his skull while i kick his gun down a drain. crowds gone ****ing wild,

    Crew locks down the club and calls a doc, girls r all over me crying n sh1t, im like "i aint got time to bleed" and sip some $1000 champage with a sh1t eating grin opn my face, when the docs turn up they couldnt believe their ****ing eyes, turns out my jacked up muscle fibras stopped that 9 in its tracks, like organic body armor or some sh1t, a normal pussied ass guy wouldve hit the bricks and died, a bullet aint sah1t to 220lbs of coiuled up fibras, you dont gotta be a scientist to knopw that.

    w2hen i say im built for this sh1t i mean it.


  2. Wah, of course.

    But a pretty funny read.
  3. WAh!
  4. If this is a wah, not subtle.

    If you are serious


    That's you
  5. A muscle saved my life once. It was my sphincter and it prevented me from shtting out my entrails after supping 15 pints of guiness with pickled egg chasers.

    Oh, by the way, nearly forgot to add that you're a tool.
  6. a bit gay in my opinion + ur a bell end
  7. Looking at his avatar I reckon it is him and he's a septic so probably not a wah!
  8. I'm loving his receding hairline; makes him look very middle-aged.

    I wonder if that guy in the hat on his right can spell his own name?
  9. He's done this sort of crap before on Rear Party ages ago but I can't find the link. There's a load more photos too, even funnier than these. I never forget a face like a slapped arrse.

    Unless it's someone else on a wind up. :?
  10. b1tch if iv posted this sumwhere else on this site its cuz this sorta sh1t happens everyday for me. im ike a fckin cage fighter son where i live b1tches be lookin for fights all the time,
    like this 1 time i mangled sum high school pussies in the park just last weekend.

    It was just another saturday for me son, counting the takings from my security company then spending a couple o hours jacking this frame the **** up.

    Driving back from the gym, got my 18 hanging out the side, letting people know who the **** is crusing past in the Porsche when i get a call from Little T. Tells me to come by the park, crews there, couples of 10s, beer n sh1t is flowing, only thing missin is my strong assed self.Get there, only problem is aint no spaces in the car park so i smash some b1tches cheap ass civic window with a brick, take off the brake n rolled that sh1t outta the space into the street. Couple pussies saw me but didnt dare say sh1t, especially since im rockin a sleeveless shirt,

    Meet uop with the crew in the park. Grab myself some beer outta the cooler and put some ice on my biceps. straight away girls r all over me trying to touch me n sh1t, telling me im the biggest guy they've ever seen. Wanna see how strong i am so i lift one up n start pressing her over my head, aint even breaking a sweat, shes enjoying it, gigglin n sh1t. The other one starts asking how many pull ups i can do. im like "sh1t, i bust out 200 for fun". About now crews all jealous n sh1t seein them all over me. Little T starts talking sh1t about doing 500 pull-ups, reckons he do em all day, so i tell him to man the **** up and show us what hes got.,

    I flex up n Little T grabs holda my arm, starts doing pull ups off of my bicep, girls are going wild seeing this kinda sh1t. T's repping em out, done about 120 by now and hes struggling like a pussy. Im like "sh1t son, that all you got", girls start laughing at his weak assed attempt as he slips and falls on the ground. Im about ready to wreck Little T upside the head for being such a b1tch when some football comes flyin in n hits one of the girls in the face. She starts crying n sh1t, her sniffling is annoying the **** outta me when some guy starts hollering from across the park, want their football back. Im thinking "hell no, somebodys about to get their sh1t mangled"

    About now guy starts talking sh1t cause i still got his ball so i launch it like a polish missile 200 yards right into that b1tches face. Even from here i see blood n sh1t go flying. Caved his ****ing face in. His friends see him hit the ground n come running over. Staright away i smash one guy upside the head with a full beer can. He went down like a b1tch, probably brain damaged or sum sh1t cause he starts droolin n shaking. Crews going to work on the other guys, pussies aint putting up a fight, dont even have to try, knocking em out all over ther ****ing place. I pick one guy up and throw him 20ft into some bushes, heard some loud snap, musta broke his neck cause he didnt come out.

    Mangled those pussys the **** up, left about a dozen guys on that field. Like some kinda warzone. Everyday sh1t to me though son.
  11. Dull cunt.

    I'll bet you're a faggot too.
  12. You are Gay.
  13. If this is not a WAH, we have a semi literate buffoon on the site.

    Reading this rubbish makes my eyes hurt and pride in my species diminish.

    EDIT to add: 90% ish sure it is just a Wah though.
  14. That's the nicest picture of six pooftahs I've seen today,gayest posse in town.
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