Sexual harasment at work,

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by sebcoe, Mar 21, 2007.

Welcome to the Army Rumour Service, ARRSE

The UK's largest and busiest UNofficial military website.

The heart of the site is the forum area, including:

  1. I reckon my delectable female doc controller wants some.

    1. she always comes into my office to chat.

    2. she is always touching my hands, shoulder, biceps.

    3. stands very close to me when talking.

    4. comes in with coffee for me.

    Do you lads reckon shes after my C0ck,
  2. I reckon she's insane..

    She has already murdered and buried several of her previous husbands and you're next on her list.

    Sorry to blow the fantasy old boy!
  3. kick

    I'm in a zero-tolerance mood!
  4. She can try, as long as she suffocates me by sitting on my face i will die a happy man :blowkiss:
  5. The usual drill has to be followed in such a case:
    F*ck her.
    Move in with her.
    Get her to pay for a joint holiday.
    Sell all her gear on eBay.
    Clear out her bank accounts.
    Then fu*k her off!

    If she tries to get even you can get her hat nailed on if she's senior to you.

    Good luck and bon voyage!
  6. Fortunatly i am Her boss, however interfering with the female staff is a part of my contract and allowed in the UAE.

    I of course will keep you posted.
  7. Duhhhh... NO she's after your job!

    By the way... the bicep touching... odd but interesting... please expand... do you work naked?
  8. Is it close to CR time??? (or whatever the raghead version you have over there is??)
  9. Of course she wants you, wimmin aren't nearly as fussy as they pretend to be. I can state quite categorically, that all women long for you to roar up 'em.
    The Cad does have a point though, just make sure you get in there first. Invite her into the stationery cupboard, take her roughly from behind and while she's curled up crying in the corner, jam an icepick into her ear.
    I find that an average size 12 burd, once dismembered, fits rather neatly into the four drawers of a filing cabinet.
  10. Women always compain about sexual harrassment. I'd be more than happy for some of the women at work to touch me provocatively on the shoulder, squeeze past me on the stairs rubbing their groin against my bum, pinch my arrse or make suggestive comments about my sexual activities, but when I do it, it's harrassment. Honestly it's one rule for slim, blonde, 21 year old secretaries and another for slightly overweight, sweaty, lecherous men.
  11. Fucking PC again the "why do men ook at me when i am wearing a short skirt syndrome" not me you cnuts the the tarts.
  12. So she's a document controller in the UAE.

    She is therefore either:

    1) The slender Indian one who dresses in european clothes and is always sharp and on the ball. Speaks very good English.
    2) The plump Indian one who wears a combination of Indian and western dress and is very quiet most of the time. Tends to get the wrong end of the stick quite often.
    3) The slender Filipino one who is totally inefficient but charming, full of fun and last to leave the bar. Capable of being smart but prone to going to nightclubs wearing little more than a handkerchief.
    4) The plump Filipino one who is fairly efficent in the office, wears jeans and well stuffed white blouses. Large handbag, Thick rimmed black framed glasses optional. Good fun but doesn't get out much.

    1) Will be after a UK Visa.
    2) Will be after a pay rise. (Doubt she'd touch you though)
    3) Will be after moving in with you. A pragmatist though, she won't expect the Visa and the wedding ring.
    4) Will be after promotion but willing to give it a go and wouldn't turn her nose up at a Visa.

    You pays your money and you takes your choice!
  13. Good Shot Sir, however she knows that i do not intend to live in the UK anymore. thanks to Blier/Brown.

    Are you out here then, if so a trip to the York for few would be in order.
  14. We dont work naked if that was the case i would be up her wrong un now, not on Arrse, however she does like touching the tops of my arms whilst wearing a short sleeve shirt. (MDN is thrashing his end)
  15. Sexual harassment in our office will not be reported, however it is graded.