Sex Frogs

Discussion in 'Blue Jokes' started by JoeCivvie, Sep 21, 2011.

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  1. A Blonde goes to her local pet store in search of an 'exotic' pet. As she looks about the store, she notices a box FULL of frogs.
    The sign says:
    'SEX FROGS'

    Only $20 each!
    Comes with 'complete' instructions.

    The girl excitedly looks around to see if anybody's watching her. She whispers softly to Pete the man behind the counter, 'I'll TAKE one!'

    As Pete packages the frog, he quietly says to her, 'Just follow the instructions!'

    The blonde nods, grabs the box, and is quickly on her way home.

    As soon as she closes the door to her apartment, she opens the instructions and reads them very carefully She does EXACTLY what is specified:

    1. Take a shower.
    2. Splash on some nice perfume.
    3. Slip into a very sexy nightie.
    4. Crawl into bed and place the frog down beside you, and allow the frog to do what he has been trained to do.

    She then quickly gets into bed with the frog and to her surprise . . NOTHING happens! The blonde is very disappointed and quite upset at this point. She re-reads the instructions and notices at the bottom of the paper it says, 'If you have any problems or questions, please call the pet store.'

    So, she calls the pet store. Pete says, 'I'll be right over.' Within minutes, Pete is ringing her doorbell. The blonde welcomes him in and says, 'See, I've done everything according to the instructions. The damn frog just SITS there!'

    Pete . . . looking very concerned, picks up the frog, stares directly into its eyes and STERNLY says:

    "NOW LISTEN TO ME -
    I'm only going to show you how to do this
    ONE MORE TIME..





















     
    • Like Like x 3
  2. A man went into a petshop and told the man behind the counter that he had been sent by his wife to buy an exotic pet. The shopkeeper immediately lent down to a box at his feet and lifted up a frog and said 'this should do you'. The customer looked at the frog and said 'I have a pond in the garden and that has got frogs in - what is so clever about this one?'. The shopkeeper said - 'this is a c0ck sucking frog' and he immediately dropped his trousers and lifted the frog up to his todger, which promptly gave the man a blow job. The customer was convinced and shelled out £50 for the frog.


    When he got home his wife asked him what he had bought and he proudly showed her the frog. The wife got very cross and said ' we have a pond in the garden and that has got frogs in - why have you gone and spent our money on that one?

    The husband replied 'I am going to teach it to cook and then you can f@!k off'