I was just lying in the bath trying to force out a rogue trump but to no avail. All the straining brought on an urge to gypsy's kiss but I couldn't squeeze that out either so I stood up to have another go. On standing up I suddenly felt a bit dizzy and it took a few seconds longer than usual to unleash a stream. Also my wife is about to return from work and find that I haven't done any of the things that I told her I was going to spend the day doing and instead have been sitting in my pants watching Only Fools and Horses and trying to convince my dog he can fly by picking him up and "Flying" him around the house making aeroplane noises. Have I got AIDS?