Serious decision. Not suitable with dining.....

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by mmm-babies-heads, Mar 28, 2008.

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  1. I apologise a bit that I have this insatiable appetite to show fellow arrsers freaks of biology and c0ck ups when it comes to my body.

    This will particularly not appeal to chaps finding uncalled for bits in the nether regions but serves to put minds at rest. B0llocks! 'Scuse the pun.

    Now findind a lump in said nether regions would startle any red blooded male in the first place as it would a woman or any Ex Para residing in Blackpool now and a bit confused as to what bits to remove/keep.

    Whilst you lot were Hailstone bathing over the Easter weekend, I totted off to A&E to have this problem looked at because I really needed crutches to to mobilise myself in any given direction.

    Cautionary tale!.... If ever offered to accept General anaesthetic to make said problem easier to deal with, I beg thee verily to accept and not 'large' it and display your lack of fear in dealing with needles. It's just that the first 10 injections in your left knacker are teeth splitting and the other one is ok. Local anaesthetic is not cool in these circumstances.
    A Sebacious cyst is not a bad thing but when forming in your spud bag and bigging itself up by taking on an Abscess as a very good friend, Mr T's friend 'pain' is foremost in your 'fookin hell that's sore' pain acceptance sydrome.
    Bottom line is go for the ' well out of it' cycle. I am now sporting a half inch gash which is unstitched and gaping, for company. Bottom line also is don't leave things because of percieved embarrassment. It wont go away! I thought 'Big C' at first, but mind was soon put at rest.

    As ever, I can't fookin size me pictures and this is bound to be massive( just like the python which is concealed by my MASSIVE hand and resting on the base of my spine round the back)
    I apologise in advance for something going wrong with my attachment (as always) Just to cancel out concern what massive bit is on which massive bit, I am sporting my left gonad with attachment.

    Why have I done this?.... Sainsburys 3yr old again I suspect.

    Please enjoy with the worlds bestest sandwich/breakfast.
     

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  2. I have to say also that I was inspired with the Portugese bloke on telly last night with 500 ball bags adorning his face.
     
  3. man u look like a pre-veet advert!
     
  4. I doubt that was a compliment with my WHO educational presentation but I'll take it as one anyway!
    I reckon thats what caused the problem in the first place! (cheaper version that is) flashing blade an' all that.
     
  5. Honking, why didn't you man up and fecking give it a big squeeze. PUFF
     
  6. Jeez mate, that looks bloody painful. Good luck for the old recovery.

    Funny ain't it, as soon as us blokes get something wrong with us we

    all immediately suspect the big "C". :D
     
  7. Had the same thing in my armpit.Doc says "whats your pain threshold like"
    Me"not too bad"We will do it with a local then"says he.
    They had to peel me off the feckin ceiling!
     
  8. In 1979 I was serving in Cyprus, we went to guard a Signals base near Dhekelia cant remember the name. Well practically over night a a huge boil appeared on me knob. Being a stupid pte Soldier I got drunk and shown my mates in the Naafi, one of them told me to squeeze it, I did. Puss everywhere pain worse than a kick in the knackers. I passed out woke up in the Med Centre, and received treatment for about two months. Glad you've not got the big C mate.
     
  9. found that photo you wanted from your triathlon days.........

    [​IMG]
     
  10. Jeez mate, that is a bit of alright. Don"t suppose she lives in this part of

    the world eh? At my age you can't be choosey. :D :D :D
     
  11. "We need a volunteer to suck out some poison"
     
  12. Fair one. Didn't want to ruin the new front doormat though.And I'm allergic to pain.
     
  13. Oh Fcuk, oh fcuk, oh fcuk! Why why why did I have to read this thread??? :(

    I'm not at work today because.... I've got a 12:00 appointment with Mr M********* at Frimley Park Hospital, for the removal a sebacious cyst from my prune sack.

    I've already elected to have a 'local' and (foolishly?) decided to drive myself home afterwards.

    This is my first and maybe my last post on the aarse. :roll:
     
  14. Firstly- Oh my god! That looks like a eye ball looking back at you!

    Secondly, if you want pain try childbirth. Pah, men!! :roll:

    Lastly, I'm glad you're OK though and it was nothing serious. :wink:
     
  15. Goodbye Lefty 478...........yeah mate it is probably the big "C".

    Anyway mate , if it is any consolation, we will start a thread in your

    memory. By the way, what is your favourite tune. :D