Sensitive issue - no, sod it "BIRD WANTED"

Discussion in 'Army Reserve' started by msr, Jun 16, 2006.

Welcome to the Army Rumour Service, ARRSE

The UK's largest and busiest UNofficial military website.

The heart of the site is the forum area, including:

Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.
  1. msr

    msr LE

    Classy bit of fluff wanted to accompany me to the Summer Ball, preferably Manchester based ;)

  2. Firstly, let me point out that I'm neither "classy" or Manchester, but want to offer a word of advice, MSR. You may need to give a little bit of information about yourself, to, errrmmm, whet the bird's appetite.
  3. How about one of these?


    Classy bird - Great tits - Still with a bit of fluff on them though :p

    Editted to add that they've even got their mouths gaping open wide for your worm!!!
  4. Translation:

    Not too fat bint required, not too much upper lip hair and no misspelt tattoos. Willing to trade a night of being fawned on by Subbies, for sex.

    Own teeth a bonus.
  5. msr

    msr LE


    In fact, I may even rule out tattoos all together...

    I also appreciate the inherent contradiction of putting 'classy' and 'Manchester based' in the same sentence....

  6. msr

    msr LE

    So, what do you want to know?

  7. Buy me a nice frock and I will think about it.
  8. He said classy.... :p
  9. It's not what I want to know, but I am sure success would depend on you making this a good proposition for the "bird". I mean, if you intend to pay here to accompany you, then ..... how much? But, even so, she may still need to know more. I would have no idea!!!! So, taking it just to be an evening (unpaid), she would want to know your age, height, build and whether you looked presentable. She would want a photo, I'm pretty sure. And, if you were going to spend a whole evening together, then you need to write a profile about yourself, demonstrating your interests and sense of humour.

    Editted to add: Oh, forget all that ...... you've got one!!!!!!!!
  10. msr

    msr LE

    Are you accusing me of 'kerb crawling'?

    Photo available on request, age 33, height 6', build reasonably athletic (as I have to pass a PFT by the end of July), presentable (under most circumstances).

    Does this help?

  11. 8O For some reason I thought you were an old git! :oops: Sorry! :D

  12. Yes I'd like a photo please!!! :D Shouldn't this be in Lonely Hearts?
  13. Yeah ..... I imagined you were short, fat and old. Yeah send me a photo!!!

    Why haven't you got a girlfriend ...... or ain't she classy enough for the ball?
  14. Going on this post he wants a ball partner, not a life partner! :roll:
  15. mmmm....... must admit I got the impression he was 'old', it's not looking too good is it Bovvy? :?
Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.