Self rape

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by Mighty_doh_nut, Jan 30, 2007.

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  1. Is it possible to rape yourself?

    At about 6 PM this evenign I was sat in the office pondering on the day when I felt an urge to sexually assault myself. I wasn't in the mood and I didn't have a woody.

    I took my own hands and agressivley ripped my trollies open and pull out my own genitals and began pumping fcuk out of it.

    At this stage I wasn't up for it, so helped the proceedings along by calling myself a dirty little slag and mentioned that I was gagging for it and the sooner I consented the quicker it would be over.

    I did make myself climax, but I didn't really enjoy it. I am now sat in a corner feeling sorry for myself wondering if I should call the police.

    I have no evidence on my body of an attack and as soon as I shot I forced myself to eat it in order that the evidence be destroyed.

    I am getting similar urges again now, but am tired, I might have to visit the knife drawer..

    Am I rapist or a victim?

    Was I asking for it? Was wearing tight jeans a mistake, am I giving out the wrong signals?
     
  2. Next time, give a little self-asphyxiation a try, might spice things up.
     
  3. I have to go upstairs to the shower in a minute, I shocked my attacker by still having the scent of sex on my wand from last night.... this didn't put him off... in fact I'm not sure it didn't get him off further.

    I have to pass by the spot where I was attacked and feel a touch uneasy... what if my penis gets grabbed and roughly handled again?

    if I try to fight him, he whispers in my ears that he will throw me in the sea or cut my ears and nose off. Do I accept that I am just some Northern monkies fcuk toy or do I make stand and demand that I am treated with respect?
     
  4. Just by the title how did I guess the Author would be MDN!!

    But would it be rape if you shouted surprise to yourself first??
     
  5. If the description given by aunty stella is correct, try heaving one of your manboobs in your wet willing mouth and fist yourself with your writing hand(still gripping a bic) whilst yanking yourself round the office with a handfull of barbed wire........OH BABY!!!!!!!!!
     
  6. Fugly

    Fugly LE DirtyBAT

    Its not rape.




    Its unexpected sex.
     
  7. MDN isn't it around this time of year they take your brain out for cleaning?

    I suppose the only way you could possibly rape yourself is if you have multiple personalities. And I am still unclear whether you have 1 seriously deranged psyche or many.

    All I can suggest is if you wake up tomorrow with your entire fist up your Gary glitter and something which reminds you of mayonnaise on your face then you'll know.

    Edd
     
  8. If you know he's going to be waiting for you at a particular spot and you still go back, you must want it, you little slut. You wouldn't want to be treated with respect anyway - I know your type.
     
  9. if you do it with your usual hand......it a wnak
    if you do it with your other hand.........it's an adventure!!!!!!!!( specialy if you've made it numb first)
     
  10. Don't you mean surprise sex??
     
  11. I know what a cumslut you are, i bet you've been teasing yourself all day you little who.re.

    You got a stiffy bonk on therefore it was consentual, i bet you even let him finger your pie hole didnt you?

    Next time he fu.cks you i hope it's hard and that he finishes you off in the bath with a 3 bar electric fire.......... Go on dare you, nay double dare you?!

    Got any photos of your asshole? (want some?)

    You not a victim nor rapist, just a slag.
     
  12. Fugly

    Fugly LE DirtyBAT

    Same difference.

    At some point in your life, you're gagging for it.

    Rape is simply a matter of poor timing.
     
  13. You could make it even more interesting and try the self rape burn back mountain. Get on all fours put an iron on your back and when your ready switch it on at the plug. The object is to thrap away (quickly) and shoot your gentleman's relish before you smell burning!
    Make sure the steam setting is switched off! :wink: