Secret Santa

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by Auld-Yin, Dec 16, 2007.

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  1. Auld-Yin

    Auld-Yin LE Reviewer Book Reviewer Reviews Editor

    Right. As all who know me, I am a miserable fecker. We have a secret santa at work with the management (or mis-management) team and we have to buy a pressie which is humerous but not more that £10.

    Usually this is not a problem but this year I have drawn Mr Nice Guy, just about the only bloke on the team that everyone likes. What the F do I get him?

    I hand over all responsibility for this to my fellow Arrsers and to help in my deliberations I am off to the local hostelry for some falling down water.

    Your suggestions will be given my full attention on my return, if I can switch on the 'pooter.

    Over to y'all.
  2. Seeings how he'll be one of the nursing staff at your old folks home, get him a pair of plastic pants.
  3. Doesn't his white beard and red coat give him away!
  4. Ann Summers vouchers. We'll see just how nice he is come the January sales.
  5. Butt plug and some Rohypnol
  6. Two pounds of liver, some vaseline and a packet of tissues - the so-called "MDN Dream ticket"...
  7. You forgot the Stanley Knife. A fresh gash every night.
  8. Just been in PC World and they have a USB controlled surface to air missile launcher for £6.99 (or 3 for the price of 2 - choice of 3 or 4 plug in USB gadgets). Gives you a control interface on your PC and lets you swing and elevate then fire foam missiles at your colleagues...
  9. Oh yes sorry guru, my bad...also the liver doesn't HAVE to be human but...
  10. Going to SWMBO works party this Friday. She came out with the magic words, "YOU have to get a secret santa pressie for Debbie". I was to do this shopping and wrapping all on my own. Debbie doesnt know who she is getting this pressi from. Result.

    Pressie wrapped and labeled handed in so no going back.
    On Friday Debbie will unwrap the pressie and reveal

    1 Box Tampax

    1 Packet Paracetomol

    1 Bar of Chocolate

    1 Durex

    Thats every eventuality covered.

    Check the Emperor Mong thread on Saturday. The b'stard may have dropped me in it again
  11. Well the Emporor Mong was mistaken this time. Debbies face was a picture and all the PTI's were pishing themselves laughing as she opened the present.

    Only SWMBO and EM know who the secret santa was. I am now awaiting the next visit from EM, as I know after my success this time. His next visit will cause me great pain