School of brown nosing ...

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by DozyBint, Feb 25, 2005.

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  1. From a strictly mathematical viewpoint it goes like this:

    What Makes 100%? What does it mean to give MORE than 100%? Ever wonder about those people who say they are giving more than 100%?

    We have all been to those meetings where someone wants you to give over 100%. How about achieving 103%? What makes up 100% in life?

    Here's a little mathematical formula that might help you answer these
    questions:

    If:

    A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z
    is represented as:

    1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26


    Then:

    H-A-R-D-W-O-R-K
    8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11 = 98%

    and

    K-N-O-W-L-E-D-G-E
    11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5 = 96%

    But,

    A-T-T-I-T-U-D-E
    1+20+20+9+20+21+4+5 = 100%

    And,

    B-U-L-L-S-H-I-T
    2+21+12+12+19+8+9+20 = 103%

    AND, look how far arse kissing will take you.

    A-R-S-E-K-I-S-S-I-N-G
    1+18+19+5+11+9+19+19+9+14+7 = 131%

    So, one can conclude with mathematical certainty that while Hard Work and Knowledge will get you close, and Attitude will get you there, it's the Bullshit and Arse Kissing that will put you over the top.