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Scared the postman today by going to the door completely naked.

#7
I bumped into an old friend and said to him, "I hear you lost your job as a Geography teacher?"

"Yeah, I've no idea why, but it doesn't matter now as I'm moving to Australia to teach."

"Why go all that way for a job?"

"Because apparently Miami has some of the best schools in the world."
 
#9
I know a joke almost as old as this one! It goes like this:

Ic eom wunderlicu wiht wifum on hyhte neahbuendum nyt; nægum sceþþe burgsittendra nymthe bonan anum. Staþol min is steapheah stonde ic on bedde neoðan ruh nathwær. Neþeð hwilum ful cyrtenu ceorles dohtor modwlonc meowle þæt heo on mec gripe ræseð mec on reodne reafath min heafod fegeð mec on fæsten. Feleþ sona mines gemotes seo þe mec nearwað wif wundenlocc. Wæt bið þæt eage.

Double entendre really........
 

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