One this Morning, "Hello this is John from Amazon" No you're fu***** not. Piss off you Wa*ker
P for PteriaI shouldn't like it thought that I sit here plotting revenge against these bastards who know exactly when I am sitting down for lunch or up on a step ladder but I have given it some malevolent thought.
I've not had the chance to act upon my plans but that time will come, no doubt.
1st Part - Annoy them gently, ie not enough for them to put the phone down;
Scammer: Are you near your computer, Sir?
Me : It's upstairs, I'll have to change phones, do you mind If I put you on hold?
(I already have an audio of (below) which I then play as "hold music")
Having taking the phone off hold, and assuming he's still there, we get to the stage where he will ask me to run the program which will allow him to take over my PC. More often than not it's a program called Team Viewer.
This is where I would hope to cause maximum confusion when I have utmost difficulty in understanding and using variations on the old phonetic alphabet parody to try to comprehend;
me: Is that "T for Two?"
Even if he gets that, he's going to have trouble with the rest;
I reckon I could string it out for 20mins or so.
A for horses.
M for size
V for la France
I for Novello
E for brick
W for Vindaloo
E for Or
R for Askey
Then I announce I've finally got the program to run;
Scammer: I can't see anything, Sir. What's happened
Me; A big square notice has popped up, - It says "Some cow-f****** is trying to scam you, turn your computer off immediately"
Think I just had him on the phone. The current scam is to claim they've blocked a fraudulent gift card and try to spook you by telling you your IP has "changed from private to public" - as evidenced by Google displaying your public IP address if you ask it to.One this Morning, "Hello this is John from Amazon" No you're fu***** not. Piss off you Wa*ker