Sandhurst CSgts

Just what you want to be hearing when you're starting Sandhurst in the New Year!
Actually my first C/Sgt was sacked to the Skill at Arms Wing for being too laid back in my first term. Gleaming guy from the Welsh Guards (funnily enough, his name was Jones!). I found the senior NCOs at RMAS to be entirely proffessional and really good guys. When I was the duty mong (College Cadet) and had to do a show parade the C/Sgt didn't turn up (a Scottish NCO with a fearsome rep). I held the parade, dismissed everyone to the bar and went to bed. Turns out he was on the razzle somewhere.

Reporting to the College SM (I have abbreviated the title as Guards despise abbreviations) the next morning I was met in the corridor by said missing SNCO. "Everything ok last night?" says he. "All correct Colour Sergeant" (never call them "Colour") says I. "Reet. I owe you a beer" and in we marched. Without prompting he paid the beer when we bumped into each other at Joe Bananas the next Friday (an out of bounds establishment).

If you lie, attempt to bullsh*t or bluff the SNCOs at RMAS then you will probably get caught and then the DS will get a 'lock-on' to their target. Result: back-term or sacked. Be honest, have a sense of humour and a bit of grit, balls and panache and you will get on well with them. For Gawds sake though; do not try and suck up to them. They would rather get anally raped by 30 turkish conscripts than allow an O/Cdt kiss their plums!
Here's a question; do you stay with the same Colour Sergeant? I remember watching a Sandhurst show years ago, and they had a different C/Sgt for the second and third terms
It depends. Normally you have 1 C/Sgt for the first term (at Old College) and then you change on moving to New College and you keep the second C/Sgt for the remainder of the course.

This can change due to a number of factors; SNCO's wife shagging someone else, him being injured, him trying to kill a floppie (fcuking lazy overseas person), him caught shagging one of the trolls from the wench platoon, etc.
The selection is continually ongoing for RMAS SNCO instructors. They go through a tough interview process (by capbadge) at Snr Cpl/Jnr Sgt level before being selected for training. This starts with priority loading on Snr Brecon, Drill courses etc. This process can take upto 2 yrs before they are then available for RMAS selection proper as a capbadge sponsored nominee. My unit has just put forward a snr Cpl (will be made up in next couple of months I expect) who is attending the initial capbadge interviews this week. He is an outstanding NCO with significant operational experience as well as having been a top instructor at ATR. Only the very best will get through. Rest assured Tsar Nik, that SNCOs are under no allusions as to what an honour (and recognition of their quality) it is to make it as RMAS Pl/Coy staff. Most of them are newly promoted to CSgt rank, but the training they have gone through gives them such swagger and poise that you'd think they'd had their crown for years.


You keep bumping into them - they are flyers.

Saw one on Op TELIC 4 and it was awesome. You are in awe of them at the 'Hurst - when you meet them after you have a great relationship with them. However, first term CSgt was a cnut.
Just for info, old friend of mine, and Bad Lads Army star, Alistair Rae, was also DS in Sandhurst as SSgt RAOC.
Not sure what platoon though but, as Ali is a nice guy, not all are cnuts.
My CSgt was a great bloke. Was missing a finger on his right hand and was some Karate/Tae Kwondo/similar champion. I only lasted part of the first term due to injury but remember him well....even saw him on parade at the Queens Golden Jubilee do in London.

Anyone know him?, Grenadier Guards if I remember rightly.

The Scots guards CSgt in the next platoon was a right g*t though, even had someone go AWOL in the first week or so.


p.s. yes I do remember my CSgts name, just not dumping it here even though he was a great bloke and should benefit from some good publicity. But would be good to hear if he's doing well, anyone know?
Tsar, you have just cheered me up. I remember having a couple of months to go before entering vortex Sandhurst. I was bricking myself and rightly so. Life is very different for a year. 8O
The colour men will bounce you very hard early on but toward the end give you more leeway. All of them were utter professionals, very good instuctors and by the end, regarded with affection. They do go out of their way to be cnuts, but that is their job, and you will (probably) have asked for it!
Only TACC but my C\Sgt was fantastic. Take heed of the "if you cant take a joke you shouldn't have joined" the jokes will be on the o\cdt's don't take it to heart it's just banter.

Practice for passing out parade and c\sgt McD**** is walking along the front of the pltn checking dressings
"Mr Fatcakes.. left slightly.... no right slightly..." queue 5 mins of dress left, dress right, then........
"As you were.. Its no use your just Fecking enormous."
Parade halted for 5 mins due to pltn being in fits..

Take everything in humor and the don't lie your way out of trouble you will be found out is a great bit of advice. Remember they are assesing your integrity don't let in come into question.


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Never make a bet over a Calcutta Cup game! Am still owned a case of beer from 1990!

Other than that most of them are trustworthy!
Proof of the quality of the pudding (as if it were even required!): my old Colour bloke - Major MBE when last seen. Company S'arnt Major Lt Col MBE when last bumped into. Seems to suggest the system, for all it's faults, picks the achievers and they prove it by continuing to achoieve far beyond the officer factory. Hats off to them all - even the real b'stards amongst them.


Generally excellent blokes in my experience, as were all the Warrant Officers. I was not noted for my ability at drill, boot bulling etc and thus my professional relationship with my platoon CSgt and the CSM were generally conducted at something close to maximum volume on their part. Even so, they retained their sense of humour. On one occasion, I was sitting in my room in a post breakfast, pre-muster parade haze, having a fag and a cup of coffee, feet up on my desk, when the door opened. Assuming it was my neighbour who had been annoying me about something, I told him to: 'Fück off you tw@t!', and then looked up to see it was actually CSM 'Dirty Harry' C*******, Scots Guards. Ooops! he reached over me, took one of the cigarettes from my packet, lit it, winked at me and said: 'Smartly casual as ever, Mr Cpunk' and then walked out again. He eventually got the elbow from Sandhurst over some misdemeanour but I bumped into him again at Buzzard Ops in Bessbrook Mill, while I was waiting to take a patrol out. I heard the voice and felt the immediate onset of cold sweat and an almost uncontrollable urge to come to attention and polish something; actually we had a pleasant chat for half an hour or so until my helicopter turned up.
Ours was truly a star. Known to the Platoon as 'Uncle John', he was the ugliest Jock Guard CSgt in NATO with breath that would strip paint at 50 yards, but, fcuk he was funny! His best mate had a platoon in the junior intake, but spent alot of time in our lines giving us grief in an amusing fashion. The pair of them should really have been on telly as a double act.
I lived at the top of the stairs and each day would start with 'Hey, you, Mr Fcuking Queensman, where's my fcuking cup of coffee? D'ye nay fcuking luv me any moor? He then lay on my pit with a fag (usually mine), drank his (my) coffee and then the day began. We adored him. Simple as that.

Meanwhile the other platoons had complete barstards, one a Coldstreamer the other a Taff. Utter purile w@nkers who made their boys' lives misery. Mates in the other Pls couldn't believe how we were treated. We got sh1t when it was due, don't get me wrong, but Uncle John was a natural leader and an inspiration. (The Pl Comd, on the other hand was a complete chod. A weedy sapper who had been a Green Howard but couldn't hack the infantry, who was universally loathed.)

At our final Pl 'do', we all got completely smashed and spent the second half howling, with Uncle John, in floods of tears!!!

Ahhh, your ex Sapper is known to me. Has a first name starting with Z and a surname beginning with S. Won the sword of honour whilst at Sandhurst and was welcomed into the Corps with open arms (lots of top brass waving a cheering). Unfortunately went horribly wrong on YO's cse. Found that being blue eyed boy at Sandhurst may not translate well to being a decent Cbt Engr (i.e. he is as thick as mince). Didn't like being in the bottom third and bailed to join the frankie howards where the last I saw he was their shining star.

My two CSgts were outstanding, one a para and the other the biggest Welsh Guardsmen you have ever seen. Both good mates and they protetected us from so much sh1t. One went on to be RQMS 1 Para the other RSM 1 Welsh Guards. Never lie to them and screw the nut and they will see you through (although there are always exceptions).


Woops got that wrong should have read your post properly. Ignore all above about said Ex Sapper.
No stories here unfortunately but connected to said CSgts. I read somewhere that you leave Sandhurst with a grade denoting your success/lack of success. Is this true and how much input do your Plt DS have in your final result?

Sorry, A different chod all together. The year was 1984, SMC 35, 5 Platoon, Normandy Coy. 'Mine' had GG as his initials and surname started with B. He STARTED off in the Green Cowards - couldn't hack Mess life in an Infantry Bn (I subsequently discovered he was the proverbial synagogue residing pock chop and loathed by all). The Sappers threw him a lifeline half way through his SSC an took him on as a RegC. Cnut. He had a platoon bonding session at his quarter - no one turned up, except a twit, who ended up as a Monkey, who had a crush on his, it has to said, gorgeous wife!!
Had a chum who was D.S,anyone recall a Sgt who's name was the same as a famous film star called Judy?

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