Gentleman, my conscious feels quite strongly that I must inform you of my activities this weekend past, not as a means of boast or self compliment, but moreso for a feeling of surreal ambiguity that it could never have happened to me. Iâm due to move to London very soon so Iâm rather excited! However, I donât actually know anyone in the city, a fair few of my old school chums work there, but strangely they arenât too eager to hear from me again after all these years. I took to the idea of trying to make some contacts online prior to moving, as that way I would have a society to spend time with when I eventually arrive. Some of the young ladies are really quite exquisite & I arranged to meet one for the first time this Saturday, a petite brunette with blue eyes, a most accomplished young lady, quite vivacious! We went for a few drinks, I discovered that she was a law student & we spent our time discussing many fine things, from politics to reality & philosophy. Then by 1am she suggested that we head to a tacky club, I wasnât too keen on the idea as I was still wearing my crombie & poppy & wasnât really sporting the clubbing attire. Iâd also just spent a small fortune for a deposit on a pad in town & explained to her that I wasnât feeling too affluent, but she insisted & even paid my Â£7 entry. I didnât bother to dance in the club as I was still somewhat sober, so I just stood by the bar as she pressed herself against me & manoeuvred her hips & thighs in rather an explicit manner, she also brought me a number of Budweisers & a shot of tequila. By this time I was beginning to feel quite guilty, not being used to spending a young ladyâs money, so I offered to buy a few drinks myself, but she would not hear of it! Come 3am we left the club & I was ready for home after a charming night, by this time she had drunk herself into a stupor, had become quite brisk & was adamant that she should have her wicked way with me. I explained that I couldnât spare a room as it would be rather bad form to spoil her at the family home & I daresay the same would go for hers, but before I could protest further she bundled me into a taxi & whisked me off to a hotel room I felt quite self conscious over the whole affair, certainly the taxi driver must have had some thoughts as I sat in the back seat of his cab with a drunken bint sprawled across my lap, she paid for the Â£12 fare too. We then entered the hotel & the chap at reception must have been equally enthralled as she paid for the Â£120 hotel room & the red wine room serviceâ¦ We ended up spilling the red wine all over the bed, up the wall & all over the floor during one of the more excessive moments, I may even have stuck it in her bum too, but Iâm not sure as I was quite drunk by then, I remember her not being too keen to have it in that orifice. So in short, Iâve just had some random bint spend upwards of Â£200+ entertaining me & then shagging me I remain in a state of shock! For me to have this sort of success with young ladies is quite unheard of. It certainly didnât help that I had a family meal this Remembrance Sunday & I struggled to maintain an air of composed dignity, only 20 mins earlier I was dining on beef slices of a rather different kind. Does this sort of thing usually happen in London I have the honour to remain, &c. ~D.C.