Rudeness, things you've said to people when they've been rude..

#1
Rudeness, things you've said to people when they've been rude..

As a small business owner I've drawn the unscientific conclusion that people are at their rudest when they have no money, or, are just being pikey. I hear all sorts of shite all day long about why they can't buy something, but usually it all boils down to one common thing, they have no money.

What's the best retort you've given some ignoramus after they been an obnoxious cunt...?
 
#2
2 quick jabs to the ginger cunts face after he tried to start a fight after it transpired I was talking to his ex outsdie a pub in 2010. Still got the scar on my knuckle as well funny watching him stagger back and his mates carrying him away saying leave him he's had enough.
 
#3
Usually find that a nicely delivered Brachial strike does the job, i've only had the pleasure once after some cunt tried it with my Mrs, he'd verbally abused her then tried his luck with me after she told him to "Go away" He was very rude to her so he was duly punished. Turned out he thought she was someone else....he wont do that again.
 
#4
2 quick jabs to the ginger cunts face after he tried to start a fight after it transpired I was talking to his ex outsdie a pub in 2010. Still got the scar on my knuckle as well funny watching him stagger back and his mates carrying him away saying leave him he's had enough.
Thats not rude, that should be standard treatment for gwars.
 
#5
When a foaming at the mouth Bouncer in Mr Smiths said, "out or I'll drag you out". I replied, "I bet your cock's not as big as your mouth". I laughed all the way to the pavement.
 
#6
After night shift at 14 Sigs in the cook house:

'Hi Nags, how would you like your eggs?'

'On a plate and quick about it'

Sorry Pal, sorry ACC.
 
#7
I think the rudest thing I have probably said is "No thank you" The No might have been like this though if I was really being a bit Ramboish. No thank you.
 
#8
I usually state that 'Manners Maketh the Person' followed by 'Rudeness Maketh the Cnut' followed by 'Rudeness Hurts' followed by a swift punch to the nose.....
 
#9
Rudeness, things you've said to people when they've been rude..

As a small business owner I've drawn the unscientific conclusion that people are at their rudest when they have no money, or, are just being pikey. I hear all sorts of shite all day long about why they can't buy something, but usually it all boils down to one common thing, they have no money.

What's the best retort you've given some ignoramus after they been an obnoxious cunt...?
At a boot fair in Cambridge, load of immigrants coming round trying to buy stuff on the cheap or get given it. £1 for that? Me no, it is £5. Them "only have a pound". Me "Still No, you can't have it".
 

TheresaMay

ADC
Moderator
DirtyBAT
#10
Someone I don't like very much, once told me I'm a "bit of a chubber"

(I admit, I was carrying a bit of 'holiday weight').


I told him, "I'm only fat cos every time I shag your wife she gives me a biscuit"

Twat.
 
#11
Someone I don't like very much, once told me I'm a "bit of a chubber"

(I admit, I was carrying a bit of 'holiday weight').


I told him, "I'm only fat cos every time I shag your wife she gives me a biscuit"

Twat.
You should start shagging your own wife, she gives cake.
 
T

Tinman74

Guest
#12
Someone I don't like very much, once told me I'm a "bit of a chubber"

(I admit, I was carrying a bit of 'holiday weight').


I told him, "I'm only fat cos every time I shag your wife she gives me a biscuit"

Twat.
Eddo brands Walt!
 
#14
Usually find that a nicely delivered Brachial strike does the job, i've only had the pleasure once after some cunt tried it with my Mrs, he'd verbally abused her then tried his luck with me after she told him to "Go away" He was very rude to her so he was duly punished. Turned out he thought she was someone else....he wont do that again.
A nicely delivered what?

Duly punished?

A punch in the arm, or a wallop using your inner bicep? Gayer.

Are you Werewolf?
 
#17
When a foaming at the mouth Bouncer in Mr Smiths said, "out or I'll drag you out". I replied, "I bet your cock's not as big as your mouth". I laughed all the way to the pavement.
Fuck me, the things you suddenly remember: ex-girlfriend, Aussie stable girl over here on a two-year ticket, bit of a looker, looked superb in joddies and went off like a frog in a sock. Anyway...

She's out exercising the the horses one day and passes a building site. Gets some trowel-holding dickhead up on the scaffolding turn round in front of all his mates who gives it, ''Ere, love, can my face be your saddle?'

She doesn't even pause for breath, just smiles sweetly, shouts back, 'Why, is your nose bigger than your cock?' and trots on.

Much laughter and one dickhead on a pisstake from his mates for the rest of the day.
 
#18
Passing the time of night in a kebab shop (out of character as I'm a fish man). Start chatting to two heavily built ladies who were obviously sisters. They didn't take a shine to the walrus (probably after a friendly patting of the bottom with my flapper). They begin to kick off forcing me to leave the premises. But not without me asking them "if Cinderella got home alright".

I got more abuse than I normally do on the Royal Mile in August.
 
#19
Me responding to annoying student twat....

"Are you a natural fucking idiot or do you have to work hard at it?"...

I've never heard a college library so quiet...apart from the nice lady librarian trying not to laugh.

:)

Rodney2q
 

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