Discussion in 'Charity Auctions' started by RTFQ, Nov 7, 2005.

Welcome to the Army Rumour Service, ARRSE

The UK's largest and busiest UNofficial military website.

The heart of the site is the forum area, including:

Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.
  1. RTFQ


    The genuine article, as described here (scroll down a bit)

    1 x DPM thong that encapsulated Little RTFQ during his encounter with unutterable evil. I will also send a signed* copy of Status Quo's epoch-defining classic "In The Army Now" with the scary keks.

    I can't do pictures from this 'puter, and frankly that would put you off the sale, but I swear on my wings that it is the actual item of clothing that featured in the story.

    The winning bidder can stipulate whether they want them clean or if they want me to do a swift 3 miles run in them first.

    If no-one bids I'll send £20 to the legion mesself.

    *When I say signed, I mean I'll draw around the little guy with a lumocolour.
  2. Mate, I'll send a score to the Legion myself if you promise not to send them to me. Honest.
  3. RTFQ


    That's the spirit veg. That's £40 guaranteed so far for the Legion. Does anyone else want to pay a randsom to the RBL to stop me sending my underwear to you?
  4. cpunk

    cpunk LE Moderator

    I'm in for £20 too, just keep the fückers away from me...
  5. RTFQ


    I've received a bid of £30 via PM from a delightful young lady with impeccable taste. If anyone wants to offer a silent bid, just PM me.

    Remember, the Quo CD is included. Just picture your next dinner party, things go quiet after the Tiramisu, the guests suddenly realise that they don't like each others' wives...oh no! Someone is about to mention religion! Do something, quick! You reach for the CD player:

    "A vacation in a foreign land..."

    Instant party. Rock out with your c.ock out.
  6. I am slightly disturbed that I am thinking about bidding for them..... Do I need help?
  7. RTFQ


    What are you trying to say? They're clean (at the moment) and tactical! Are my pants not good enough for you? Or is it the veterans? do you hate the veterans Flowers, is that it? Not worthy enough are they? Didn't sacrifice enough for you, maybe?

    Put your hand in your pocket and buy my pants. They're better value than a limited edition figurine of the People's Princess by Royston Doulton (available in 12 convenient monthly payments) out the back of the Sunday Express.

    And for you, flowers, I'll put in something you can use while thinking of me.
  8. Charmer! What a line!

    8O *gulp* really? errr.....lucky me

    A baby carrot?
  9. flowers you could just put your hand in his pocket and feel those pants!!!

    disturbed? NEVER!! A worthy cause go on you know you want them!
  10. RTFQ,

    I've just read the story behind the pants, are you sure there not tained with evilness or have you had them exorcised by a qualified priest! Going on the "service history" and "milage" i think I'd pay you to burn the fu*kers - you can't sell a curse like that on!!

  11. RTFQ


    No, one of these.

  12. PMSL, was expecting something completely different and not work safe!!

    (do I get the trainers too?!)

    OK ok, seri-mousely now. What is the current bid on these RTFQ? And will they 'smell' of you? :lol:
  13. RTFQ


    The current bid stands at £30, the successful bidder stipulates whether they want them clean or recently worn. As a side bid, Cpunk and Vegetius have paid me 20 knicker each to stop me sending them their way.

    They'd make a great chrimbo present.
  14. I might use them as a desk ornament, casually drapped over the corner of my monitor....

    Should I be lucky enough to win, could I have a photograph of you posing in them? :lol: (full lunge position please)

    Ok ok can I bid £32.37p?
  15. RTFQ


    [align=center][marq=up]"Army captain auctions off thong pictures in Net shocker"

    A commissioned officer, codenamed "Captain Crumpet IV" by The Scum, sold lewd photographs of himself in Special Forces cheesewire underwear while he posed in the elite 'lunge' position as used by soldiers in Iraq. The officer, believed to be a member of...[/marq][/align]

    Er, no
Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.