Romance is not dead! The things one does for arrse.

Discussion in 'The ARRSE Hole' started by Brevet, Aug 27, 2013.

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  1. OK, this will sound like an excuse but I did genuinely click on one of this site's advertisers' adverts by mistake. Initially. And then curiosity got the better of me, and it has been a bit of an eye opener. Here is an unabridged profile of a doris who seems to know what she wants:

    I've got a thing for grime boys and thug style, so long as they are a bit freaky and know how to please an older woman or want to learn. Sorry, if you don't fit this description, I won't be replying as I'm looking for a specific type because I'm just into getting a few of those hot young black / mixed race thug guys at the moment.

    Not really interested in anyone over 30, you must love eating pussy and live within a couple of miles of me. Don't have time for long treks and don't always know when I'll get free time, so you need to be close enough for an emergency fuck :).

    My favourite position is standing up, from behind, deep in my pussy after I'm warmed up. Even better if the guy can reach my clit with his hand at the same time. Makes me squirt all night.

    Massaging oil all over my fat arse and tits is pretty horny, play with my nipples and slide your hands all over my body. Play with my pussy and make me squirt all over you. Need to clean it off tho, to stop the condom breaking, but nice still.

    For more pics, get Kik.
  2. Well she sounds like a right catch. Was she any good, Last to know?
  3. FFS, mum, I'm cancelling that Talk Talk subscription I gave you for Christmas.........
    • Like Like x 8
  4. It seems I do not match the criteria. Will change my details to yours and report back.
  5. Where is he/she when you want him/her/in between?
  6. Did we really sign up to defend this? Or was the female entitlement problem ever thus? From the same source that I accidentally clicked on again:

    its a sex figure it out! OK!!! Stop messaging me for a bit and lets put some parameters around this shit! FFS my laptop cant cope...I have only done this once before coz you nuttas just go mental! I'm not putting pictures up but i am not fugly! happy to send them to people who spark my interest! I am however a biker, i'm not sweet, i ride a fucking big Harley, if you are a mincy, ugly little twat - you people know who you are...dont bother, if you are overtly religious...dont bother...dont bother if you havent got at least 8 inches and at least 8 hours in will get hurt, its just fair warning boys, you want barbie...fuck off down the local nightclub, i don't do orange, fake eyelashes or pink in any way shape or form! Lets see if that separates the men from the boys!
  7. I say, she does sound a bit forthright and dare I say it, pre-menstrual.
    • Like Like x 2
  8. Sexist bastard.
  9. see, told you...
  10. Ignore last post as a) you're a bloke and therefore not pre-menstrual (or are you) and b) I was doing more than one thing at once and fucked it up.
  11. She still sounds mental though...
  12. No, it was not me, I don't subscribe to mental, just alcohol! Dale was it you???
  13. Can't be Slugy, the adertising bint mentioned "fat arse" an even "tits".
    • Like Like x 1
  14. Ah I know, it was Chubb! or maybe even a cousin of hers who used to frequent this site ha!