Reversing Army Amalgamations of Recent Years

The way that things are going I sense that it will soon be time for HMG to consider reversing some of the nonsensical ‘Defence Cuts’ that led to much downsizing, amalgamation and just plain destruction of centuries of tradition. IMHO the red pen has been wielded far too enthusiastically by successive Secretaries of State for Defence. With at least the sniff of a threat from that Boris Puking fellah, I do think it right and proper that we keep our options open. Let’s assume for the sake of argument that the current incumbent in Whitehall has been caught viewing porn whilst toting a suitcase full of Russian Vodka around the House of Commons. For one day only you are in charge. Which Mob would you resurrect Phoenix-like from the ashes?

Well, my bid is for the following outfit to get a second chance. And in the right hands it could be self-funding and therefore not a massive drain on resources like Crab Air or those Boat People.

The Military Massage Corps

The Almeric Paget Massage Corps (APMC) was founded in August 1914 by Mr and Mrs Almeric Paget. The Pagets funded 50 fully trained masseuses to be sited in the principal Military Hospitals in the UK, beginning in early September 1914. The service was such a success that the staff numbers were quickly increased to over 100. The Hon Essex French was appointed Honourable secretary to the Corps, and the first OC – Capt Broad - was appointed from the RAMC to be OC Massage, Hydro-therapeutics and Gymnastics. Amongst the recruits to the ranks were Miss Sarah Chuck (Head Masseuse), Miss Stout (I/C Section at Highfield Military Hospital, L C L Cuppage and WO M Jekyll.

The work was hard, starting at 0900hrs with a 30 minute lunch break and a 10 minute tea break at 1415hrs. Each masseuse would see 30-40 patients per day and provide treatments that included massage, hydrotherapy, electrotherapy and “… stimulating muscles with the ‘Bristow coil’ or subjecting a limb to interrupted galvanism, ionization or a Schee bath, diathermy or radiant heat”. So said Miss Sarah Chuck, matron-in-charge at the World famous Alderhey hospital. (I’m with you there, ma’am.)

In November 1914 the APMC set up a Massage and Electrical Out-Patient Clinic at 55 Portland Place, London for the treatment of wounded officers and men, again wholly financed by the Pagets. The property at Portland Place was loaned by Lady Alexander Paget. Throughout the war an average of 200 patients per day benefited from the services of the clinic. (That just has to be a money maker).

Official War Office recognition came in early 1915 by making it the official body to which all masseurs and masseuses engaged for service in military hospitals should belong. The word “military” was added to the corps’ title in December 1916 and in January 1919 APMMC became known as the Military Massage Service by Army Council Instruction, and then later a Corps. Until early 1917 members of the Corps were only required to serve in the UK, but from that date onwards service overseas was an option. A total of 56 masseuses served in France and Italy between January 1917 and May 1919.

One of the MMCs Units was based at Netley Military Hospital – a place that, even now, strikes fear in veterans of a certain age and disposition.

I have a suggestion for Colonel-in-Chief. That former bounder and flying matelot Andrew York seems to have all the right stuff to take this role, especially as he appears to be somewhat at a loose end these days. I am getting nowhere on the Regimental March/Slow March, though, because for some reason I keep getting stuck on “Hit Me With Your Rhythm Stick.”
 
I'd reverse the 2006 changes.

Bringing back the Kings, Borderers, Queens Lancashire Regiment, Green Jackets, Light Infantry, Duke of Wellingtons, Black Watch, Welch Fusiliers, Staffords, Cheshires etc.
 

CharleyBourne

War Hero
Book Reviewer
The way that things are going I sense that it will soon be time for HMG to consider reversing some of the nonsensical ‘Defence Cuts’ that led to much downsizing, amalgamation and just plain destruction of centuries of tradition. IMHO the red pen has been wielded far too enthusiastically by successive Secretaries of State for Defence. With at least the sniff of a threat from that Boris Puking fellah, I do think it right and proper that we keep our options open. Let’s assume for the sake of argument that the current incumbent in Whitehall has been caught viewing porn whilst toting a suitcase full of Russian Vodka around the House of Commons. For one day only you are in charge. Which Mob would you resurrect Phoenix-like from the ashes?

Well, my bid is for the following outfit to get a second chance. And in the right hands it could be self-funding and therefore not a massive drain on resources like Crab Air or those Boat People.

The Military Massage Corps

The Almeric Paget Massage Corps (APMC) was founded in August 1914 by Mr and Mrs Almeric Paget. The Pagets funded 50 fully trained masseuses to be sited in the principal Military Hospitals in the UK, beginning in early September 1914. The service was such a success that the staff numbers were quickly increased to over 100. The Hon Essex French was appointed Honourable secretary to the Corps, and the first OC – Capt Broad - was appointed from the RAMC to be OC Massage, Hydro-therapeutics and Gymnastics. Amongst the recruits to the ranks were Miss Sarah Chuck (Head Masseuse), Miss Stout (I/C Section at Highfield Military Hospital, L C L Cuppage and WO M Jekyll.

The work was hard, starting at 0900hrs with a 30 minute lunch break and a 10 minute tea break at 1415hrs. Each masseuse would see 30-40 patients per day and provide treatments that included massage, hydrotherapy, electrotherapy and “… stimulating muscles with the ‘Bristow coil’ or subjecting a limb to interrupted galvanism, ionization or a Schee bath, diathermy or radiant heat”. So said Miss Sarah Chuck, matron-in-charge at the World famous Alderhey hospital. (I’m with you there, ma’am.)

In November 1914 the APMC set up a Massage and Electrical Out-Patient Clinic at 55 Portland Place, London for the treatment of wounded officers and men, again wholly financed by the Pagets. The property at Portland Place was loaned by Lady Alexander Paget. Throughout the war an average of 200 patients per day benefited from the services of the clinic. (That just has to be a money maker).

Official War Office recognition came in early 1915 by making it the official body to which all masseurs and masseuses engaged for service in military hospitals should belong. The word “military” was added to the corps’ title in December 1916 and in January 1919 APMMC became known as the Military Massage Service by Army Council Instruction, and then later a Corps. Until early 1917 members of the Corps were only required to serve in the UK, but from that date onwards service overseas was an option. A total of 56 masseuses served in France and Italy between January 1917 and May 1919.

One of the MMCs Units was based at Netley Military Hospital – a place that, even now, strikes fear in veterans of a certain age and disposition.

I have a suggestion for Colonel-in-Chief. That former bounder and flying matelot Andrew York seems to have all the right stuff to take this role, especially as he appears to be somewhat at a loose end these days. I am getting nowhere on the Regimental March/Slow March, though, because for some reason I keep getting stuck on “Hit Me With Your Rhythm Stick.”
Everybody likes a happy ending.
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Man Pig

Old-Salt
Simples. Back to the glorious Eighties. 3 Armoured Divisions plonked back in the fatherland, probably a bit further east this time around, might even have one based in Poland. An inf Div back in York & all the magnificent Corps & Regiments that would involve.
 
I'd reverse the 2006 changes.

Bringing back the Kings, Borderers, Queens Lancashire Regiment, Green Jackets, Light Infantry, Duke of Wellingtons, Black Watch, Welch Fusiliers, Staffords, Cheshires etc.

Good luck finding the blokes (and birds) to make up the numbers.
 
The way that things are going I sense that it will soon be time for HMG to consider reversing some of the nonsensical ‘Defence Cuts’ that led to much downsizing, amalgamation and just plain destruction of centuries of tradition. IMHO the red pen has been wielded far too enthusiastically by successive Secretaries of State for Defence. With at least the sniff of a threat from that Boris Puking fellah, I do think it right and proper that we keep our options open. Let’s assume for the sake of argument that the current incumbent in Whitehall has been caught viewing porn whilst toting a suitcase full of Russian Vodka around the House of Commons. For one day only you are in charge. Which Mob would you resurrect Phoenix-like from the ashes?

Well, my bid is for the following outfit to get a second chance. And in the right hands it could be self-funding and therefore not a massive drain on resources like Crab Air or those Boat People.

The Military Massage Corps

The Almeric Paget Massage Corps (APMC) was founded in August 1914 by Mr and Mrs Almeric Paget. The Pagets funded 50 fully trained masseuses to be sited in the principal Military Hospitals in the UK, beginning in early September 1914. The service was such a success that the staff numbers were quickly increased to over 100. The Hon Essex French was appointed Honourable secretary to the Corps, and the first OC – Capt Broad - was appointed from the RAMC to be OC Massage, Hydro-therapeutics and Gymnastics. Amongst the recruits to the ranks were Miss Sarah Chuck (Head Masseuse), Miss Stout (I/C Section at Highfield Military Hospital, L C L Cuppage and WO M Jekyll.

The work was hard, starting at 0900hrs with a 30 minute lunch break and a 10 minute tea break at 1415hrs. Each masseuse would see 30-40 patients per day and provide treatments that included massage, hydrotherapy, electrotherapy and “… stimulating muscles with the ‘Bristow coil’ or subjecting a limb to interrupted galvanism, ionization or a Schee bath, diathermy or radiant heat”. So said Miss Sarah Chuck, matron-in-charge at the World famous Alderhey hospital. (I’m with you there, ma’am.)

In November 1914 the APMC set up a Massage and Electrical Out-Patient Clinic at 55 Portland Place, London for the treatment of wounded officers and men, again wholly financed by the Pagets. The property at Portland Place was loaned by Lady Alexander Paget. Throughout the war an average of 200 patients per day benefited from the services of the clinic. (That just has to be a money maker).

Official War Office recognition came in early 1915 by making it the official body to which all masseurs and masseuses engaged for service in military hospitals should belong. The word “military” was added to the corps’ title in December 1916 and in January 1919 APMMC became known as the Military Massage Service by Army Council Instruction, and then later a Corps. Until early 1917 members of the Corps were only required to serve in the UK, but from that date onwards service overseas was an option. A total of 56 masseuses served in France and Italy between January 1917 and May 1919.

One of the MMCs Units was based at Netley Military Hospital – a place that, even now, strikes fear in veterans of a certain age and disposition.

I have a suggestion for Colonel-in-Chief. That former bounder and flying matelot Andrew York seems to have all the right stuff to take this role, especially as he appears to be somewhat at a loose end these days. I am getting nowhere on the Regimental March/Slow March, though, because for some reason I keep getting stuck on “Hit Me With Your Rhythm Stick.”

Yeah. And another thing, I want all the red uniforms back and large bear skin hats.

And blanco. Lots and lots of blanco.
 
Tenth Icenii (Queen Boudicca’s Own) - the obvious advantages being that their chariots would be Londinium ULEZ compliant and the spears more-or-less lead-free - Romanes don’t like it up ‘em.
Oh and Woad is hypo-allergenic.
 
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All this means fack all, when you haven't got the money to pay for it all. Start with getting rid of all the corrupt incompetent morons in procurement and the MOD and you might be able to afford more people
 

Cold_Collation

LE
Book Reviewer
Soooo, the way to balance an army with too many infantry is to add infantry?

Riiiiight…

What needs to happen is about far more than cap badges. Cap badge obsession has helped get us in this state.
 

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