rent a German and smile

Discussion in 'The Intelligence Cell' started by björn, Jun 6, 2005.

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  1. From an article in today's Times.

    Is this a yet another cunning plan to invade the world on an individual basis and getting paid for it? Maybe Prince Harry could take tips from one for his next reenacting stint (that would be the surprise package).
  2. 1200 euros to rent one for you business!!!!!

    look at some of the reviews

    Adam G., 48 (San Francisco):
    “It was awesome! Having a German at the office for a week was a huge success! Since then, my relationship with my co-workers has improved big time! I’ll definitely do it again- It was, like, “oh my god, this is so it!”

    Carl Hagen, 58 (New York):
    “After dinner, we watched TV together with the entire family. Suddenly the German started to cry. It was such real and pure emotion. I’d never seen this before. The support package cheered him up again and we read German poems together ‘til 3 am. Even Grandma stayed up and enjoyed the exotic sound of words like "Rasenmäher, Motorsäge or Solidargemeinschaft". Rented again, before our new friend left.”

    This has to be a joke?
  3. Bed-wetting epileptic german?[​IMG]
  4. If you want to stay to stay up until 3 am reading German Poetry it can be freely obtained under plain wrapping and is fully user friendly without the need for you to let Uwe,Rudiger or Lisl over your threshold with their oddly shaped spectacles,toilet themed pornography and european social democrat politics.I'even got some here I'm prepared to share because my avatar gets a mention....................................

    Acht Knechte trieben ihren Herrn zum Sterben.
    Glanzlos am Galgenberg verglomm ein Stern.
    Und Schnee fiel gläsern über Schnee gleich Scherben.
    Die trunknen Knechte johlten um den Herrn.

    Straff schritt er in zerschlißner Sträflingsjacke,
    unwandelbaren Hochmut im Gesicht.
    Die Schultern trugen schwere Eisenhacke,
    und seine Augen unverhülltes Licht.

    Wozu die Hacke? -- -- -- Um mein Grab zu graben.
    Wozu das Leuchten, Mord-umbrüllter Mann?
    -- -- -- Es ist ein Dank, -- ich will ihn bei mir haben,
    damit ich, -- wenn's so weit ist, -- lächeln kann ...

    Mir ist von Wolken über meinem Parke
    seit Kindheitsfrühen sehr viel Glück geschehn ...
    Und sprich: wozu, trotz Fluch und Tod, der starke
    Hochmut in dir? -- -- -- Zum Wiederauferstehn!

    See, anyone can do it :lol:
  5. That lot look like the victims of aggressive self-abuse. Plus Anna, here, who's looking at the results:

  6. Today being the anniversary of something or other.I thought this might cheer up any visiting germans :lol:

    Und Goebbels brüllt ins Mikrofon:
    "Wo bleibt Eure Invasion?"

    Am 6. Juni um Mitternacht,
    Da hat's geblitzt, da hat's gekracht
    Und alle Leute wußten's schon:
    Zip, zip, di dudela, die Invasion.

    Lastensegler, Fallschirmspringer
    Und noch and're schöne Dinger
    - Bombenteppich monoton:
    Zip, zip, di dudela, die Invasion.

    Und auf dem Festland ist man drauf
    Und nach Berlin geht jetzt der Lauf.
    Berliner Luden hotten schon:
    Zip, zip, di dudela, die Invasion.

    Offiziere, Helferinnen
    Wälzern sich in weißen Linnen,
    Plötzlich ging das Telephon,
    Zip, zip, di dudela, die Invasion.

    Die Hitlerjugend, groß und klein,
    Die mußten in den Volksturm rein,
    . . . .
    Soll das die Vergeltung sein?
  7. Hitler must be fully booked! :x
  8. I'm going to start a "rent-a-Scot" website!

    Business - you can have a tightfisted Aberdonian enliven your business, with such phrases as "ye'll no be wasting yer bawbees oan that"...

    Leisure - With a Glaswegian psychopath or a Leith junkie, the world is your oyster! Get "steaming" on "Buckie" and "put the heid in" or spend a more placid evening injecting heroin or "jellies"...

    Eating out - A full Burns supper, or a fried Mars bar - the choice is yours...

    Entertainment - You can spend the evening being amused by a bearded Scotsman telling lots of rude jokes, or by someone playing the bagpipes...

    Surprise - you might even get a ginger one!
    • Like Like x 1
  9. Oh might be ok, Number 1 and 32 both reckon they are up for anything :twisted: Can I rent them as a pair?