Quotes For The Media (Please add your own)

#1
Roll up, roll up, no need to pay, they're free and heart felt!

On Tony Blair: PM, Sir, resign now just in case things get worse...

On Gordon Brown: Don't bother moving into No. 10, your parties not going to get re-elected to office!

On the middle east: Why don't we just help arm Isreal, they're the Daddy when it comes to keeping Arabs in their place!

On Iraq: Bring the troops home, the countries FUBARed.

On Afgahnistan: See 'On Iraq'.

On Des Brown: Do you ever get the feeling your civil servents are trying to screw your career into the ground.

On the USA: Only the terminally stupid forget the lessons of somewhere that starts with V and ends in humiliation!

On George W Bush: See 'On the USA' (not that you'd know about the 'V' place you combat dodging shaven chimp!)

On the 15 ex' hostages: Welcome back, shame the First and Second Sea Lords fcuked it up for you, that's officers for you!

On the Queen: God save you Ma'am (because what your government is doing to your armed forces, we might not be able to...)

Come on boys and girls, vent your spleen, tell our lovely Journo friends what you think

Oh, one last one....

On the News Media: I've got medals for putting bullets into people I have more respect for than you!
 
#2
"When we realised we were going to be kept overnight by the Iranians, I realised with sinking heart that my pyjama case and Mr snuffles were still in my bunk on HMS Faraway..." Rear Admiral Lard Gutbucket MBE WRNS
 
#3
'... shock horror exclusive.' can I copywrite that and sue The XXX every couple of weeks?


""..said a member of The ARmy Rumour Service recently, who was not paid for his comments, however a donation was made to the RBL on hes/her behalf.
 
#4
"Those who forget the past, are condemned to re-live it!"

ok that's not my quote, but seeing as the scum never seem to bother why should i!

"what's good for the goose is good for the gander!"
damn i've done it again
 
#6
I think all journos should be shot dead and then made to write the truth.
 
#7
I particularly liked this, posted on RR by a very reasonable American:

"I'd also like to leave you with a quote from General Robert E. Lee, who commanded the Confederate Army during our civil war. As you can see, nothing has changed in 150 years.

It appears we have appointed our worst generals to command forces, and our most gifted and brilliant to edit newspapers! In fact, I discovered by reading newspapers that these editor/geniuses plainly saw all my strategic defects from the start, yet failed to inform me until it was too late. Accordingly, I'm readily willing to yield my command to these obviously superior intellects, and I'll, in turn, do my best for the Cause by writing editorials--after the fact."
 
#9
I have always fully supported Tony Blair and his wife cherie... fcuking off before they destroy this country even more.

I've got a nine inch penis and I'm not afraid to use it.

"In today's news a gopping civvy cnut on ARRSE extolled the virtues of "chucking manfat up a tranny's mangina" minutes after lambasting Faye Turney, who he believes is hiding the last chicken in the shop beneath her loose clothing. That concludes the BBC news at 6 :D"
 
#10
the_matelot said:
Quote this journos...

the_matelot said:
"I shagged Sophie Raworth up the arrse!"
:D
You've already been quoted! At least you got reconigstion for it though!

Narcissus said:
I shagged Sophie Raworth using the_matelot as a condom!
Now just wait for the "Shock HM Forces gang bangs are happing at tax payers expense" headland in the red tops.
 
#11
Yet another 'bandwagon' thread!

They can quote my personal message to Mr. Blair if they want though:

"I know where you live........"
 
#13
How about "Army overstretch hell?"
 
#14
the_matelot said:
Quote this journos...

the_matelot said:
"I shagged Sophie Raworth up the arrse!"
:D
Hmmm...delete "Sophie Raworth", insert "many an old slapper" and I would believe that...

I therefore sentence you to three giggles and a titter...but not with big Sophie.
 
#15
Mr_Deputy said:
On googling Sophie Raworth I just came across a picture of her in the musical 'Hair'.
Where? Because I didn't...
 
#16
Cuddles said:
the_matelot said:
Quote this journos...

the_matelot said:
"I shagged Sophie Raworth up the arrse!"
:D
Hmmm...delete "Sophie Raworth", insert "many an old slapper" and I would believe that...

I therefore sentence you to three giggles and a titter...but not with big Sophie.
HOW DARE YOU accuse me of shagging old slappers... :x

I make sweet love to them... :D
 

Biped

LE
Book Reviewer
#17
"An ARRSE from ARRSE seeks love up a tunnel, an ARRSE tunnel. ARRSE!"

It is the general consensus on ARRSE that the general consensus amongst ARRSE members is that they are truly representative of the Great British Peoples having reference in their numbers to people from all corners of the country and various other parts of the globe, from all walks of life, not to mention representation by both sexes and even some in between. The great ARRSE membership, being so effectively representative of the British Electorate have come to the conclusion that if their view on the Great Leaders (present and wannabe) is reflected across our once great nation then (apart from the work-shy, the illiterate, those in jail, those who don't belong here and those who hate this country and couldn't care less anyway) the Labour Party in its current incarnation has NOT ONE HOPE IN HELL of getting past the next elections NO MATTER which odious OIK they choose to represent them. Such is the consensus.
 
#20
the_matelot said:
Cuddles said:
the_matelot said:
Quote this journos...

the_matelot said:
"I shagged Sophie Raworth up the arrse!"
:D
Hmmm...delete "Sophie Raworth", insert "many an old slapper" and I would believe that...

I therefore sentence you to three giggles and a titter...but not with big Sophie.
HOW DARE YOU accuse me of shagging old slappers... :x

I make sweet love to them... :D
OK - delete 'many an old slapper', insert 'selected shipmates'.

:D
 

Similar threads

Latest Threads

Top