Quality Quim Quotient

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by Schleswig-Holstein, Aug 13, 2009.

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  1. In an attempt to standardise the assessment of the relative quality of the blart in different cities, a mate and I have developed the Quality Quim Quotient.

    Method:
    Walk for 3 mins and count all the women that you would happily cheat on your other half with.

    I'm in Montreal at the mo' (QQQ = 45), and it is close to pipping my previous high score of Rio (QQQ=50)... The women here are amazing.
    Copenhagen was another high scorer (~35), but unfortunately, where I live (Belfast), the QQQ is negative (I had to keep counting for 5 mins before I saw owt that scored).

    We'd appreciate scores from other locations before we publish our results...
     
  2. Not even worth counting in Yeovil...
     
  3. Command_doh

    Command_doh LE Book Reviewer

    In Thailand, its not even worth bothering counting. Everyone walking down the street (female) under the age of 45 usually qualifies.

    In my local area mind, its significantly harder to find a tasty female. The odd lost Pole would get it, but unless you like Somalians and their flowing hooded capes, pickings could be described as slim otherwise.
     
  4. Biped

    Biped LE Book Reviewer

    QQQ of Hastings - similar to Glesga on pension day.
     
  5. Barrow In Furness

    QQQ = 2, and thats being generous and pretending the beer goggles are on



    Smash
     
  6. What if you're single...is it justified if I just count the amount of women I would do anyway...or is that removing the key variable of cheating on the missus?
     
  7. S-H, have you thought about registering/trademarking this new grading system? It could be included in the UK Tourist Guides...

    LONDON
    Hotels - 4/5
    Value for money - 2/5
    QQQ - 78

    etc etc
     
  8. Isn't a standard level of intoxication required, I mean a QQQ of 5 could easily turn into a QQQ of 50 merely by adding the requisite amount of booze.

    Should it be QQQ=5/1 Pt to say QQQ=20/6 Pts?
     
  9. Hmm, good question. As you note, by dropping the component of risk, we loose an important explanatory factor.

    We could develop a new, more basic index, which I hereby refer to as the Rideable Female Score (RFS). However, I think its value is limited, as for most of us posting here, the RFS will only be limited by the local sex ratio, visual acuity, and walking velocity.
     
  10. Tehran: Some of them are all in black of course, but of the rest hmmmmmm a good 38 I think (its subjective of course).
    Vietnam: Conflict of interest here, I just cant get past those slant eyes and glossy black hair. Small, perfectly shaped breasts, perfect figures aaaaargghhhhh. Thinking back to my last visit to Ho Chi Minge earlier in the year.... mmmm mebbe 40.
    Korea: Evening rush hour and all the office girls going home from work. Stand / walk in the street in Seoul and it has to be at least 70.
    Cambodia: Phnom Penh - at least 28 but on the way to the Martini bar on a Saturday night maybe 50.
    Botswana: (Gabarone) 23, but fer fucks sake stand still when they walk the Regimental Lions by on chains.
    China: Provincial cities 10; Beijing 19.

    All done from memory, but reasonably accurate as I used to do a similar exercise from street cafes. Still do.
     
  11. I here that Haute de la Garenne in Jersey could even manage a 10 at times . . . .









    No, thanks, I'll see myself out.
     
  12. Good lad. The spirit of Flashman still lives on....
    I'm quite happy to share authorship when we write this stuff up for publication :wink:
     
  13. And I will happily do confirmatory recces :wink:
     
  14. This is one of the only things that keeps me sane in Belfast! :D

    We have tried to counter this by conducting different QQQ surveys through the day. One on the way from the accommodation in the morning, a lunchtime one, one before dinner and then one at night....

    However, if you are stuck for time, an alcohol-free lunchtime QQQ survey is probably the most reliable in our experience.
     
  15. Just did the Fulham road. It's not that busy but it scored and impressive 26, especially considering that I had to walk past Chelsea & Westminster Hospital!

    I'll be double checking Chelsea tonight as I'm out on the lash. Stand by for Pre and Post pub scores!