Pubs and Bars

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by B_AND_T, Aug 3, 2007.

?
  1. Yes

    10.3%
  2. No

    43.1%
  3. She's got a pulse hasn't she.

    46.6%

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  1. B_AND_T

    B_AND_T LE Book Reviewer

    The other night my boredom level hit an all time high. I thought about a bit of stress relief, but the old chap is a bit sore at the moment. So I decided to go and explore the delights of town.

    After going to a couple of bars and enjoying a few pints I decided to head home. On the way I passed a bar that I hadn't been in before. Oh well one for the road, went in and ordered my drink. I was served by a pretty young lady with all the bits in all the right places.

    I was sat there taking in the sights, totty spotting, and enjoying my beer. Time for another one.

    I turned to the bar to order and was confronted by a creature from hell. Long ginger hair, and by God do I mean ginger. A major acne problem, slightly buck teeth and she was built like an anorexic racing snake. She even had the audacity to wear a bra. FFS I have got bigger tits. She made Karen Carpenter look like Bella Emberg.

    Now my question is, should it be compulsory for Pubs and Bars to only employ good looking women, or is it ok to employ the love child of Plug and a Swan Vesta?

    Your thoughts?
     
  2. Nothing wrong with the odd ugly barmaid think of the ugly squaddie who has no money for pinkies! the ugly barmaid s were invented for such people! and if they were all stunners you would never get served as every tom dick and harry would be ogling them thus slowing down the delivery of the next beer! think laterally!
     
  3. A few more schooners and they will be alright mate. Saves you going home alone. Just stick with it mate. Blues need loving too. LOL... I mean gingers
     
  4. B_AND_T

    B_AND_T LE Book Reviewer

    That's why they have a thing called Cha Cha's.
     
  5. The Fally school of dancing. That place has it's fair share of munters and thats just the wives.
     
  6. Very, very good point! Thinking outside the box!
     
  7. B_AND_T

    B_AND_T LE Book Reviewer

    But the point is, if I want to go and admire 45 stone of pure rippling sex than that is my choice. Is it right that it forced upon me. Think along the lines of the smoking ban.
     
  8. Biped

    Biped LE Book Reviewer

    Take it where you can get it, that's my motto.
     
  9. God invented beer so ugly birds can get screwwwwwwed. 8)
     
  10. old_fat_and_hairy

    old_fat_and_hairy LE Book Reviewer Reviews Editor

    No such thing as an ugly barmaid. Just a sober customer. Soon remedied. Anyway, they may be thinking the same of you.


    Not me, naturally.
     
  11. All you have to do is switch the light off.
     
  12. As a former participant in Aldershot Grot nights, ( winner is the one who pulls the ugliest bird) I endorse the message that if it has a pulse ....

    I also was the winner of a grot night once :D :D :D :D

    The WRAC who pulled me won a bottle of champagne from her mates :cry:
     
  13. Don't get all arrogant B&T, the average soldier isn't much to look at either. It's what inside that count's.

    Inside her rear end, that is.


    So: Just bend her over and give her one for Queen and Country. It's your duty as a man! :twisted:

    Edited to add that if you bend her over and service the lass from the 6 o' clock position, the ugly mug won't matter so much. Her bum will seem bigger too!
     
  14. Nothing wrong with Gingers.
    Or anorexic.
     
  15. Yes there is! I got to shag a skinny gwar model once. I was all too happy, going "Yeah! I'm fcuking a model! Owaaaahhhr!"

    But the bint was bloody skinny and the next day I had weird bruises on my loins... :oops:

    Still. I DID shag a model...