PTIs exhibitionist?? Surely not!

Discussion in 'Army Reserve' started by xpat, Jun 19, 2006.

Welcome to the Army Rumour Service, ARRSE

The UK's largest and busiest UNofficial military website.

The heart of the site is the forum area, including:

  1. Picture the scene - PTI selection, hilly CFT on a muggy Edinburgh afternoon, a sweaty post selection briefing discusses what' best to wear for CFT, and before you can say five poond o' tatties an instructor is demoing Lycra undies! No one was offended, it was all PC & in the best POSSIBLE taste (in fact the instructors were all pretty damn good at pitching the chat at the right level as well as the phys - impressive).
    Anyway, is it a requirement of the job to be exhibitionist? I personally hope so being a showoff & looking to be a trained up PTI pretty soon, but being a recent recruit I've not that much experience of the PTI.
    So help me out guys & gals - what's your best PTI story?

  2. I believe the general rule is to buy Clothing that is 2 sizes too small, this is to draw attention to the pti's physique.

    On the other hand I do not have this problem as most items of clothing are tight on me anyway :D
  3. Yeah I got a similar story to that, on a PTI selection weekend after a hilly CFT in edinburgh PTI is talking about decent underwear for tabbing and he does the same! Hang on a sec...that was me :D

  4. Thought all you jocks went commando?
  5. eSel - Only when there is a need to scare the English. Insulation is a high priority up here.
  6. So I've been told; sure according the English, us paddies & jocks don't need cold-weather clothing as we're so used to it...
  7. Well on a similar note this does remind me of last new year where me and my mucker (also a PTI) while in Stolkholm pissed up (in kilts obviously) so we decided that it would be a good idea to run around the city at 3am in nothing but a pair of boots and a sporran. Our attempt to get into the gay club was suprisingly and in retrospect thankfully denied.

  8. What about the 3 jocks, not PTIs, who ended up in the stripclub in Denver?! You know who they are and how they got there!!
  9. Reminds me of a Danish Beerfest bad kilt experience - made it back to the tent OK but collapsed with only top half in tent. Midges made short work of the tackle. Not recommended.
  10. Yes those 3 :) 2 of which had some serious explaining to do to their better halfs when they got home!

    Or the other 3 on the day of flight home from denver who went to some random bar got urined up and made everyone in the bar and all those who came in after them strip to their underwear.

    Happy days.

  11. err, why attempt to get into the gay club??? Surely that was asking for a world of pain...
  12. Because it sounded like a good idea at the time :D. Anything when drinking that starts with the sentance "It would be a good idea if I/we...." I find is always gonna lead to trouble.

    Also reminds me (pulls up sand bag, swings the latern and thinks that back in the day they had real sandbags and lanterns really swung...) of my first platoon piss up after passing p coy. Me and Rickie 3 balls, had just past and were out with the lads (including a certain jock PTI whos about to get married in vegas and a jock who moved down to cardiff with his then missus, Gluck_ab im sure you know them :)). Anyways both me and Rickie 3 balls were given some daft challenge that I lost so I had to take a punishment which involved getting naked and doing naked pressups on the club we were in's dance floor. Not gonna look like an arrse infornt of the blokes on day 1 I stip off and dive on the dance floor franticly banging the pressups out thinking Im gonna get chucked out at any moment, I get to 20...25...30 hang on Im getting tired. No bouncer had noticed so I walked of the dance floor. Anyways I get dressed and we head next door to the next club. Where they are holding a transvetite of the week contest for some fresher faire thing. Even more gassed now I decide "It would be a good idea" to enter it. The idea was to get some chick to give you her cloths make up etc So we get started and Im getting nowhere and the other guys have some how got themselfs squared away with dresses, skirts bras etc. Im thinking Im gonna lose this badly until the flash of insperation. I drop the kegs and pants and stick my c0ck between my legs. The DJ took one look and handed me the champagne :D.

    I was never confused.

  13. You owe the NHS one keyboard & one flat screen 17" monitor for coffee spat over it.

    If you want a lively night, may I suggest lederhosen?? Fanny magnets they are; but they're also easy got out of - the mile long streak was fine but cold and the lederhosen were pvc - chaffing was excrutiating and hot sweaty clubs compounded the problem. When the appropriate photos were passed around on my wedding day, comments like 'well he must have money' were heard... :oops:

    More to the point, so getting neked is par du course then?? Suits me...