Prostrate Examination

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by right-grumpy, Dec 17, 2012.

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  1. I’m a bit worried. I have just been sent a message from the Med Centre. I have never had one of those man medical things where they shove their finger up your arse! I’m happy with that but it appears they are not and I now have an appointment.

    I have read about this finger up the arse prostrate massage and the possible arousing effect. Now I am happy if this is a fit young(ish) female (with slim fingers) but, what if it is a bloke? Do I claim to be a Para?
  2. PROSTATE!!!! Unless they're doing it with you lying down!!!!

    Don't worry, it won't turn you on!!!
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  3. Google
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  4. Oh it's probably NSFW.

  5. Holy fuck, I've read it wrong and now I'm not even going to be laying down!
  6. I had the full camera and bowel scrape jobby about 12 years ago, I was shitting blood for 2 days after, it was character building.
    And it was a bloke, but at least he lubed up first.
  7. You know when you go to the doctors and sit down to talk to him and you notice that there are marks on his desk that look as though somebody has been bending over his desk and gripping the sides so hard they left finger marks?

    You're about to find out just what those marks are caused by.

    Also it's now illegal to deny people jobs due to disability so just pray that your rectologist doesn't have macrodactyly

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  8. My Doc is ex Para !!
  9. Wait until you have the biopsy - something that resembles an industrial food blender is stuffed up yer ring and starts to tear lumps out of each segment of your prostate (think satsuma) through your poopipe wall... yep like the man says - shitting blood for days

    Posted from the ARRSE Mobile app (iOS or Android)

  10. If he has both hands on your shoulders while he does it....... it's time to get worried.
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  11. Snigger.........Jobby :)
    • Like Like x 1
  12. Well, at least one of you will have fun.


  13. If you have to have it removed. google TURP

    Transurethral Resection of the Prostate
    • Like Like x 1
  14. Maybe I should not look and just believe that while I'm asleep the Good Fairy will fix it................. No not you Jarrod!