pros and cons

I’ve been single for a while now and while at home nursing a bottle of wine i got to thinking MEN why do we need them (apart from as sperm donors of course :) )

I have taken the liberty of compiling a small list of pro's and con's


DIY (but they normally start it and leave us to finish it)

Plenty of peace and quiet while they spend time with the boys in the local

Sex (when there not too slaughtered to get it up)

Presents when they know they have fcuked up (so almost daily)

Give us cute ikkle babies


Dirty pants and w@nk sox left strategically around the house

They don’t vibrate!

Dominate the T.V remote and hate your soaps

Kick your cat

Slag your mum (that’s slag not shag)

Allergic to any form of housework

I apologize to those men who don’t match the criteria above I am aware I am categorizing you all!

The above are to mention a few, but really MEN why do we need you?

What can you do for us that we cant do ourselves?

blondy :)
Why do we need women?

Plus points:

Do the washing, cooking, cleaning, sexual favours, what they're told (after some beatings),

We can shag their mums.

Bad Points:

Winge when we don't finish the DIY,

Winge when we go down the pub,

Winge when we don't go the distance in the sack (there's no prizes for coming second),

Want Presents & Children.
Bad points

Won't do what they are fcuking told to do.

Good points

Will do what they are told to do after a good fcuking beating.
We kill spiders. (Seen some tough women reduced to tears by the thought of spiders).

We can provide comfort that women can't. (Far to touchy feely)

We can put power behind a thrust up your brown love hole that no vibrator can (just to compensate for the touchy feely stuff).

We have our own bank cards and credit cards for you to abuse.

and last for now...

We die sooner than women so you get all our money when we snuff it.
and roxygirl has got cracking jumper bunnies
Hmmm. Methinks Dizzy has been burnt and should drop the wine/whine and get out and meet some men! Agree with jumper-bunnies comment - woohoo!
Christ Dizzy, you must live in a different world to me, a world of emancipated, independent, practical women.
I still live with my ex (its a long story) and have just been away for a few days, during which time, she had a friend over for a long "girly" weekend.
During the time I was away, they managed to let the bath overflow and fuse the lights, neither of them thought of finding the fuseboard and re-setting the circuit breaker, so they had to live by candlelight for two nights. :roll:
Although I gave them free access to my extensive wine collection, they had gone without as they coudnt find a bottle with a screw-cap. :roll:
They managed to accidentally pull one of the TV signal cables, and coudnt figure out how to replace it, so no telly :roll:
When they put the central heating on (first time for six months) it made a banging noise (bleeding the radiators takes five minutes) so they switched it off again and wore their coats. :roll:
Theres more, but I wont go on as I'm sure you get the picture.
Incidentally, they are both "professional" women in their thirties with a combined income nudging £100k.

Wimmin! :roll: :wink:

Similar threads

Latest Threads