Probably never happened, but bloody funny anyway

Discussion in 'The ARRSE Hole' started by error_unknown, Jun 28, 2005.

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  1. WHY IS IT THAT WE HAVE TO SPEAK ENGLISH?

    A U.S. Navy Admiral was attending a Naval conference that included
    admirals from the U.S., English, Canadian, Australian and French
    Navies. At a cocktail reception, he found himself standing with a
    group of half dozen or so officers that included personnel from most
    of the countries.

    Everyone was chatting away in English as they sipped their drinks but
    a French admiral suddenly complained that, whereas Europeans learn
    many languages, Americans learn only English. He then asked: "Why is
    it that we always have to speak English in these conferences rather
    than speaking French?"

    Without hesitating, the American Admiral replied:"Maybe it's because
    the Brits, Canadians, Aussies and Americans arranged it so you
    wouldn't have to speak fucking German."

    Suddenly the group became very quiet.
     
  2. Seen on many a website but still worth a repeat.

    1. The Japanese eat very little fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than the British or Americans.

    2. The Mexicans eat a lot of fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than the British or Americans.

    3. The Japanese drink very little red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than the British or Americans

    4. The French drink excessive amounts of red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than the British or Americans.

    5. The Germans drink a lot of beers and eat lots of sausages and fats and suffer fewer heart attacks than the British or Americans.


    CONCLUSION: Eat and drink what you like. Speaking English is apparently what kills you.
     
  3. Ah, but the Spams actually had a vote (pre-WW1) after pressure to have their official language as German. It was closer than one would imagine.

    Details anyone ?.
     
  4. Whiffler:

    The vote over the language issue in the USA came post Continental Congress when the fledgling country was getting on its feet.. A significant power block in the government was from the Pennsylvania ' Dutch ' and others whose first language was German..

    Their proposal was defeated by vote in Congress from membership from the former English colonies..

    Still an issue as some states have enacted legislation to keep English [ or their version of it ] the offical language to block the increasing intrusion of Spanish [ California and Florida and parts of other southern US states have a' majority' of hispanic speakers as citizens/immigrants/illegal residents which affects socio-economic and , now political, matters..] from being legislated as an official language for government services. etc.

    still, civil servants are increasingly being hired who can speak Spanish dialects to deal with people who have little or no command of the Anerican tongue despite being part of the great ' Melting Pot '...
     
  5. Brilliant Flash_to_bang! I bloody hope it was true.