Pressurising pensioners to have sex?

#2
Van, hammer and black nasty jokes in 5... 4... 3...
 
#3
I used to know an old boy called Hector from Blackpool, and he used to come down to London every 6 months or so to go and see some West End shows. We used to meet him and have dinner.

We were chatting one night and he put his hand in his pocket to get something - the movement caused something in his jacket pocket to peep out - it was a box of Durex.

The old bugger was 84!
 
G

goatrutar

Guest
#4
I used to know an old boy called Hector from Blackpool, and he used to come down to London every 6 months or so to go and see some West End shows. We used to meet him and have dinner.

We were chatting one night and he put his hand in his pocket to get something - the movement caused something in his jacket pocket to peep out - it was a box of Durex.

The old bugger was 84!
He could've just been using them for a posh wank...


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G

goatrutar

Guest
#5
I've fucking seen full on granny porn. The image of an 80 odd year old slut, complete with runny fried egg tits and moth eaten cunt fellating overweight middle aged sad fuckers, will remain in the wank bank till my final days.


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#7
Miss Ironside. Enough said.
 
#10
I'm really glad I read this thread, I really enjoyed it, if it pleases your honour I'd like to have five instances of me liking the French taken into consideration.....
 
#11
Helen Mirren

Thread closed!
 

old_fat_and_hairy

LE
Book Reviewer
Reviews Editor
#13
Gardening? What a stereotype! Ok, I was at a garden centre earlier today, but only to buy citrus oil for the large candle thingies on bamboo sticks that go in garden. And for lunch. ( garden centre, not bamboo whatsits) And I bought the bamboo stuff in Poundland. Fancy that, only a quid each for them, and so many other useful bits there. Anyway, where was I ? Oh yes, pensioners being pressured to have sex.
Not me. Bloody wish someone would pester me. And there is more to life than gardening and Werthers. Oh, that reminds me, bought some lovely boiled sweets in the garden centre, sour plums. Of course, mine are after all this time too.

And I bought some lovely sand coloured trousers and a polo shirt at the market, will go lovely with my suede shoes.

Bugger. Is that the time? Got to feed the cats, and take the dog out before it gets too late.
 
#14
I used to know an old boy called Hector from Blackpool, and he used to come down to London every 6 months or so to go and see some West End shows. We used to meet him and have dinner.

We were chatting one night and he put his hand in his pocket to get something - the movement caused something in his jacket pocket to peep out - it was a box of Durex.

The old bugger was 84!
He told me he got them for his Dad
 
#15
I was on Golf course today,didn't get pestered once.Even after pulling out my banana.To boost energy levels.Obviously.
 
#16
From the title of this thread, I had thought it would involve pump-up surgical appliances.
I am disappointed.
 
#18
When my mother was 74 and my dad 80, she explained to my sister that my father was in a bad mood because he'd become impotent, but she was secretly pleased because she was finally getting a rest!

A year later, my ex and I were helping them move house, on shifting my dad's bedside table I heard something rattling around inside, opened the drawer to reveal a penis pump (or whatever they are called). I guess my mother wasn't getting any more rest...
 
#19
This is depressing news. The one thing I would have looked forward to in my dotage would be not having any interest in rough sweaty doggy position or tit spaffing sex with a busty milf met online for said purpose. Looks like I am going to have to keep logging on to plentyoffish.com until I'm firing dust then. Bag o shite...
 

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