Prepping for the Kung Flu Apocalypse (The not entirely serious thread)

Does that mean whisky wouldn't work either. I have heard of whisky being added to porridge.
To be honest if I was serious about this I should buy in some porridge anyway.
Whisky now you're talking, unlike beer I've not tried that one on cereal but it should work

It's surprising what you will try in a bothy when supplies are scarce
 

kimmi851

War Hero
Does that mean whisky wouldn't work either. I have heard of whisky being added to porridge.
To be honest if I was serious about this I should buy in some porridge anyway.
Have you been reading my office coronavirus emergency plan?

"We will set the office dog to make sure the postie keeps his distance, and all employees will drink at least a dram of whisky a night to fend off the bugs and beasties" (we wrote it this morning, we feel it covers everything)
 
Pfffft!

Once I establish myself as the local chieftain, the woman will throw themselves at me for protection.


...and procreation!


Well either that or some of the female species of Apes you find in the Zoo .. or so I believe Orangutan used for sex 'screamed and defecated' when owner visited her in rehab - All World Report
snip "Pony was just a baby when she was snatched from a forest in Borneo and chained inside a brothel in Kareng Pangi, Central Kalimantan.
She was shaved daily and repeatedly raped by men who would visit especially for the chance to have sex with an animal.
The primate was also forced to wear jewelry and perfume and she learnt to gyrate when ‘clients’ approached."

bugger beaten to it by "Taffwob" & "goodoldboy"!
 
Well either that or some of the female species of Apes you find in the Zoo .. or so I believe Orangutan used for sex 'screamed and defecated' when owner visited her in rehab - All World Report
snip "Pony was just a baby when she was snatched from a forest in Borneo and chained inside a brothel in Kareng Pangi, Central Kalimantan.
She was shaved daily and repeatedly raped by men who would visit especially for the chance to have sex with an animal.
The primate was also forced to wear jewelry and perfume and she learnt to gyrate when ‘clients’ approached."

bugger beaten to it by "Taffwob" & "goodoldboy"!
Wild? She was livid...
 
Lots of rough shag ..... pipe tobacco that is .... which I will smoke furiously when ever I go out and about .... in my time I have incinerated many a midge / fly which was drawn into the pipe bowl by a good suck ... I am sure this " Klung Fu " or whatever will suffer a similar fate in my pipe ... I shall keep such a fug around me that other members of the public will stand back to avoid any contact with me .
 
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OK, own up, who's been ferreting through the loft, hunting for that respirator and the CBRN kit ?
 
Got this the other day:

View attachment 452372
I seem to recall the story of a student at Aberdeen Uni who loved porridge so much he bought a big bag of oats and tried to live off that and that alone. Allegedly it was to free up more money for beer, but it was the first case of scurvy Aberdeen Royal Infirmary had seen in donkeys years....

And yes I know that says pinhead outmeal, only really useful for skirlie stuffing to have with mince.
 
You keep horses?
My brother-in-law breeds racehorses. One murmour of an outbreak in my area, I'm grabbing the dog, the guns and the radios, and heading to his farm and living of a million or so dollars worth of horse steak for a few weeks (as well as goats and chickens. Might even raid the livestock nursery nearby if need be)

Regarding @CptDanjou's signature, the amount of idiots around here at the moment is astounding. Everyone at the shops swamping the poor bastards wheeling out toilet paper then walking out with trolley loads of toilet paper. They've also cleaned out the dry pasta aisles at the supermarket, which is bizarre considering there is prepackaged side dish rices, canned pasta and big bags of rice and other non perishables nearby that have been untouched.

Might even get a chance to do some stock trading while I am getting some peace and quiet.

 
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