Prepping for the Kung Flu Apocalypse (The not entirely serious thread)

Right! I've got the obligatory week-or-two's worth of tinned goodies in case of quarantine. But, if it really goes tits up, I reckon I've got enough survival gear to keep me going indefinitely.

Various choppy and cutty things; fire-making tools; water filtration gizmos that should last until I get a still set up; and, a decent sized collection of non-device-dependant gentleman's periodicals (grot mags).

As far as food goes: I've got a some 70's era combat kit and all the right stuff to go full-on Robin Hood. As luck would have it I'm far enough out into zur cuntryzoide to be within 20 minutes of deer territory.

There's a zoo within a days hike, so after I've caught my breath (so to speak) I plan a raid to capture some monkey butlers, and a leopard to be my hunting companion (or a pack of wolves - I haven't decided yet).

What am I missing?
 

TheAssassin

War Hero
Right! I've got the obligatory week-or-two's worth of tinned goodies in case of quarantine. But, if it really goes tits up, I reckon I've got enough survival gear to keep me going indefinitely.

Various choppy and cutty things; fire-making tools; water filtration gizmos that should last until I get a still set up; and, a decent sized collection of non device-dependant gentleman's periodicals (grot mags).

As far as food goes: I've got a some 70's era combat kit and all the right stuff to go full-on Robin Hood. As luck would have it I'm far enough out into zur cuntryzoide to be within 20 minutes of deer territory.

There's a zoo within a days hike, so after I've caught my breath (so to speak) I plan a raid to capture some monkey butlers, and a leopard to be my hunting companion (or a pack of wolves - I haven't decided yet).

What am I missing?
Female company
 
Right! I've got the obligatory week-or-two's worth of tinned goodies in case of quarantine. But, if it really goes tits up, I reckon I've got enough survival gear to keep me going indefinitely.

Various choppy and cutty things; fire-making tools; water filtration gizmos that should last until I get a still set up; and, a decent sized collection of non-device-dependant gentleman's periodicals (grot mags).

As far as food goes: I've got a some 70's era combat kit and all the right stuff to go full-on Robin Hood. As luck would have it I'm far enough out into zur cuntryzoide to be within 20 minutes of deer territory.

There's a zoo within a days hike, so after I've caught my breath (so to speak) I plan a raid to capture some monkey butlers, and a leopard to be my hunting companion (or a pack of wolves - I haven't decided yet).

What am I missing?
I have rivers, full of trout.
Sheep for meat, plenty of fresh water, coal for fuel, easy enough to build shelter, beech and pine woods.

The sea isn't that far away either.
 
Right! I've got the obligatory week-or-two's worth of tinned goodies in case of quarantine. But, if it really goes tits up, I reckon I've got enough survival gear to keep me going indefinitely.

Various choppy and cutty things; fire-making tools; water filtration gizmos that should last until I get a still set up; and, a decent sized collection of non-device-dependant gentleman's periodicals (grot mags).

As far as food goes: I've got a some 70's era combat kit and all the right stuff to go full-on Robin Hood. As luck would have it I'm far enough out into zur cuntryzoide to be within 20 minutes of deer territory.

There's a zoo within a days hike, so after I've caught my breath (so to speak) I plan a raid to capture some monkey butlers, and a leopard to be my hunting companion (or a pack of wolves - I haven't decided yet).

What am I missing?
You could build a cage for the east European big issue ladies and make some soylent green to sustain you, the other sources of protein will dry up quickly due to overpopulation.
 
I've got 20 camping gas cannisters and one of those huge color gaz thingies, think I'd be ok cooking for a few weeks

Water is rarely an issue round here either, it never stops raining worse case
 
You could build a cage for the east European big issue ladies and make some soylent green to sustain you, the other sources of protein will dry up quickly due to wanking like a belt fed wombat
FTFY
 
Right! I've got the obligatory week-or-two's worth of tinned goodies in case of quarantine. But, if it really goes tits up, I reckon I've got enough survival gear to keep me going indefinitely.

Various choppy and cutty things; fire-making tools; water filtration gizmos that should last until I get a still set up; and, a decent sized collection of non-device-dependant gentleman's periodicals (grot mags).

As far as food goes: I've got a some 70's era combat kit and all the right stuff to go full-on Robin Hood. As luck would have it I'm far enough out into zur cuntryzoide to be within 20 minutes of deer territory.

There's a zoo within a days hike, so after I've caught my breath (so to speak) I plan a raid to capture some monkey butlers, and a leopard to be my hunting companion (or a pack of wolves - I haven't decided yet).

What am I missing?
Ingredients for the sauce to cook the venison with and some zip lock bags to make up your boil in the bag compo. Don't blame me if you trap air in it and the bag bursts.
How to Vacuum Seal without a Sealer | DIY | Life Hacks
 

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