Pregnancy Scare

#22
smartascarrots said:
You now have a ready supply of donor organs for your old age.
You seem to have made the assumption that onfire and I share the same tissue types!

Sh'it, don't let on will you!!!
 

Legs

ADC
Book Reviewer
#23
Biped said:
Kicking her down the stairs is the best option, but I would suggest getting some mates around first.

Place her on the top step, facing backward down the stairs, hoof her in the stomach and get your mates to hold up score cards for artistic impression and style.

Ooooh, no, stop meself, I'm off to hell in a handcart!

Alternatively, run away with her sister and leave your missus to make the decisions.
If she scores less than 5.0, take her back to the top for a re-show.
 
#24
Just a quick point, you say you bagged it up, and also used the chemical prevention method?? Simple way out of this scrape, accuse her of shagging some other bastaad bareback, and forgetting her pill, then you have free reign to beat the crap out of her, chuck her out and keep the house 8)

Problem solved... No applause.. no really, no, stop it.... why thank you.. :roll:
 
#26
flowers said:
Loubella is onto a winner. Have it then flog it!

Possible suggestions are:

Medical research
Buy One Get One Free Adoption Schemes
MDN......
If no joy with the above - Holiday in Portugal in a few years - jobs a goodun!

CC_TA
 
#29
#30
STOP PRESS

i have just had the news - the pregnancy test was negative ... but thanks for your suggestions!

... can i still push her down the stairs though ;-)
 

old_fat_and_hairy

LE
Book Reviewer
Reviews Editor
#31
onfire said:
STOP PRESS

i have just had the news - the pregnancy test was negative ... but thanks for your suggestions!

... can i still push her down the stairs though ;-)
Surely thats a given anyway. Do it several times, just to be sure.

By the way, Congrats/ condolences depending on how you feel.
 
#32
Well done or deepest sympathies onfire, depending on the mood. Should you ever feel the need to produce offspring let me know in advance and i can lend you a couple of contraceptives that will put you off the little darlings for life...



honest its fine i wont need them back, well not till they are earning anyway...
 
#33
onfire said:
STOP PRESS

i have just had the news - the pregnancy test was negative ... but thanks for your suggestions!

... can i still push her down the stairs though ;-)

Only if you are feeling truly romantic
 

old_fat_and_hairy

LE
Book Reviewer
Reviews Editor
#34
flowers said:
onfire said:
STOP PRESS

i have just had the news - the pregnancy test was negative ... but thanks for your suggestions!

... can i still push her down the stairs though ;-)

Only if you are feeling truly romantic
And throw a wreath after her.
 
#35
Atleast she can't say you never giver her flowers then.
 
#36
if it had turned out to be pos,you could have walked away clean by claiming you`d had the chop afew years back:)

that would have given you free reign to beat ten bales out of her!

either that or next time il lend you my whisk and ferret,he`s a nasty little bugger who`s ALL teeth!!

or take her for a quick bungie ride(quick, sharp, and gets rid of the entrails if she does it naked!!
 

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