Practical Jokes

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by Morty, Sep 19, 2006.

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  1. Something happened to me at the weekend, and I need ideas for practical jokes to get two people back with. Nothing too violent, they have kids.

    Any ideas?
  2. next time at their houses add Immac to shower gel or shampoo.

    If you work with them screen shot their PCs and load it as a screensaver. Watch them spend hours trying to work out what has happened.
  3. Good call...the 'something' that hapened this weekend involved loss of hair.
  4. Come on Morty - tell us :D
  5. Ever seen the haircut on that bloke from the Prodigy, kind of shaved down the middle with spikey bits on the sides?

    Thats what I looked like when I woke up sunday morning.

    In the words of Withnail...'The f***ers will rue the day!'
  6. :judge: :D :D :D

    Sorry, I meant.... oh dear

    I'm a Firestarter, twisted firestarter
  7. Could pose them a dilemma

    Wait for similar opportunity and shave off 1/2 and eybrow on one side.
    The dilemma is

    a. Do they shave off 1/2 on other side to balance ? - look ridiculous
    b. Do they shave off complete on both sides to rid themselves ? - look ridiculous
    c. Leave it - look ridiculous

    Or you could just shave some gangsta stylee lines on both sides see what that does at work ?
  8. Wrap thier kids in barbed wire and pour petrol or something equally volatile on them, force the dad to stand near them, at gun or knife point, then light a Zippo and balance it on the dads head having gaffer tapped his hands and ankles then make the mum suck you off and then do her gink(or do dad what ever your pref) he will have the choice, stand very still and save the kids or move towards his violated spouse thus torching his kids.

    That'll learn them.
  9. If you just want harmless revenge then it has to be imac (or Veet to give it new name) in the shower gel and posibly bleach in the washing machine ready for the next wash.
    How ever proper revenge involes electrical tape a baseball bat and a field of cows.

    Sorry just noticed today is yet another SD spelling mong day. :oops:
  10. 1. Take one of those home made ice lolly things.
    2. Fill it with water
    3. Insert a small length of barb wire
    4. Place in freezer and wait several hours
    5. Remove from freezer
    6. Tie person down and insert ice lolly up their arrse
    7. Wait for a bit
    8. Untie them and allow them to extricate the remains of the lolly
  11. If the kids are of school age, phone your 'mate' mid morning posing as the headmaster.

    Tell him that the kids have been abducted by a suspected paedophile and the police are doing everything they can to track the suspect down.

    How he will chuckle when he finds out it's a jolly jape.
  12. Class, well done....I can see many tears being shed when I see them this weekend. I love the ice cube and barbed wire trick!

  13. Well done that man!

    Now, when does that nice man from the Council come round?

  14. Morty I feel your pain!!

    An ex of mine used to be an air stewardess and she had a trick of putting a squirt of eye drops in someones drink, which resulted in giving them the sh1t's, water that would pass through a sieve style.

    Or if you do really want to hurt them take an adjustable spanner and just loosen the sump plug on thier car, it'll rattle lose and fall out down the road dumping all the oil out and knackering the engine, personally I think that migh tbe a bit harsh but hey it's your call mate
  15. Like the eye drops idea. You could also add it to the shits medicine you bring round as a concerned "friend". Agony/humour could be prolonged for at least a week.