possibly the worst film i've ever seen - "Thugs, Mugs and Dogs"

Discussion in 'Films, Music and All Things Artsy' started by CRmeansCeilingReached, May 30, 2011.

Welcome to the Army Rumour Service, ARRSE

The UK's largest and busiest UNofficial military website.

The heart of the site is the forum area, including:

  1. i don't often post in this forum, but after watching a DVD last night i feel moved to warn fellow Arrsers.

    Thugs, Mugs and Dogs is 143 minutes of my life i will never get back. however, i find that i can actually laugh at the waste of time that this cinematic experience provided - because it was so bad, it's almost compulsory viewing.

    i've been out of the country for a while and not kept up with film releases. on impulse, walking past a DVD stand i bought this one with dave courtney on the cover, billed as "best british crime film since snatch".

    i really don't know where to start. the plot is terrible. the writing is so poor that the actors seem embarrassed to be delivering some of their lines. of course, the "actors" include such (cinematic?) heavyweights as lisa riley.

    the inept direction / writing includes everything from a farcical "chase" scene, which is a cross between tom and jerry and the keystone kops... there is a truly bizarre bit in the middle, where five girls - for no discernible reason - start doing a (poor) choregraphed dance routine, out of the blue. no rhyme, reason, explanation or relevance to the plot. (someone on IMDB suggested that one of them must be someone's girlfriend and they wanted to be in the film; it's the most likely explanation, i think).

    some of the jokes are older than stonehenge ("give him a biscuit and he might let you")... yet the writer seems to think he is original and hilarious. it's hard to know which is worse - the script, or the rigidly wooden delivery from the leading characters.

    the writer also appears to want to be crazy and outrageous, with bad guys making completely predictable jokes about a legless victim... and the funeral scene seems self-consciously attempting to be a bit "mad".

    i could go on, but i don't want to spoil it for anyone tempted to view it in its awful entirety!

    seriously, it's so bad, it's worth a watch. i am seldom conscious of things like script and direction when i'm watching a film, but this pile of shit forces you to wonder about those behind it.

    when off-beat things happen from a good writer / director, they work. when some deluded fool deliberately tries to do these things, the result is something which you feel might have been written by a teenage boy and shot by an undergraduate in his first year of film studies.

    seriously - one of the most utter shit films i've ever seen, but almost compelling viewing (once only) for all the wrong reasons.
  2. *cough*Dave Courtney*cough* nuff said
  3. I managed to get through 5 minutes of that total utter shite.
  4. This is also 'severely' shite ..........

  5. my missus walked out after 20 minutes and went for a bath. i was too busy giggling at the acting to miss the rest of it.
  6. We have a winner.

    Anything remotely connected with Courtney is guaranteed to be a crock of shite.

    Intelligence Corps, poooof.....
  7. is he notorious for shit films then? can't recall seeing him in anything else, off the top of my head.
  8. Yep, was subjected to Lesbian Vampire Killers on Friday, to make it worse, I was half-cut.

    What was all that about then?
  9. Yup, he's done a few and he reckons himself to be a real thesp.

    I recall a court case he was involved in years ago where he was worried a conviction would cost him his "Future Hollywood Career" as he earnestly put it, he was found not guilty and we await news of offers from Spielberg et al.

    I watched his film Hell to Pay a while back, looked like it was filmed on cam, worth watching for all the reasons you stated in your first post.

    Courtney is a ******* clown.
  10. That indeed looks truly ******* awful.

    Well spotted.

    PS For my money, the 1948 classic The Treasure of the Sierra Madre is my all time favourite for worst film ever.
    It might have Bogart in it, but how Walter Huston missed the 1949 Academy Award for overacting very badly is a mystery to me.
  11. No mate he is a one time pseudo gangster with pretensions to be a media celebrity.
  12. If you have never heard of him CR the following gives you a small idea of DC's world, here >> Dave Courtney - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

    I have memories of him doing the doors at the Shakespeare pub in Powis St, Woolwich during the 1970s whilst I was at depot.

    He is a dick.
  13. well **** me it is a small world
  14. Do you remember him as well Herr Random?

    Tell them what a dick he was. Especially in front of squaddies when young birds were in the vicinity.

    A real hardman from the Eltham school of hardmen.
  15. I went to school just round the corner from there albeit a few years later I think its fair to say hes a legend in his own living room

    lets just say someone who knows someone was involved in one of his arrests and he was very very compliant