POOR LITTLE WHITE BOY

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by The_Magician, Feb 24, 2010.

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  1. I thought I would place this little ditty in the NAAFI BAr

    This is a true story Guys and not one plucked off the top off my head. I was based in Hounslow (West London) in the Mid Eighties, decided that I had enough of the Army and informed my CO that I was to part ways after 9 years service. I Left in May 88 and started work at Heathrow Airport as a Security Supervisor (No drain on the nation) I was renting a room in a house with shared facilities which at the time was costing me £270 a month plus bills electric, phone, gas etc

    About two months later I met my old Welfare Warrant Officer in the Pub (Yip I used to drink as a civvy) and he asked how things were I told him it was ok but my biggest gripe was paying £270 plus bills for a pokey room in a house. He then explained to me that I was an “Incoming Worker” and because I worked since the age of 16 (I was then 28) I had accrued enough points over those years to entitle me to at least a one bedroom flat. Armed with a letter of evidence from the very same WO a week later I had an appointment with someone from the councils Housing Department.

    I was ushered into a little booth where upon I met them ‘Man from The Council’, I think his name was “Rashid Hussian” or something I could be wrong. We had a long conversation and he was explaining the rules and regulations to me and then he started to wind up the interview when he said to me (In his bestest Pigeon English!! I have a neck talking about Speaking English I am a Porridge Wog!!) , now I will never forget this to my dying day.

    “Mr ******* I have taken on board all of your points however the best thing for you to do is go ‘Back to your own country’ where you may have a better chance of accommodation”.
    The man telling me this was not a British born Asian but one who been in country 12 years at that time, so I was duly put back in my box. I know the question you are all going to ask?

    “Did you kick off?” Your dam right I kicked off and chased the little Bar Steward across the council offices, to hear him screaming like a girl was good enough for me. I then took myself back to Cavalry Barrack and asked the RSM if I could re join and the rest they say is history.

    The Moral of this story is “It is not only in recent years we have been Shafting our own”

    Aye

    Magic
     
  2. Ravers

    Ravers LE Reviewer Book Reviewer

    He was right.

    If you don't fcuking like it go back to the land of deep fried Mars bars and Buckfast, you filthy porridge wog.

    :D
     
  3. Surely there is a damp dark cave somewhere in Porridge wog land you could have shared rent free with a dead badger?
     
  4. I think I would still be in the jile for tearing the cnuts arms n legs off.!!

    Had a similar experience with her HM tax office in Leeds, twats said I'd never been in HM forces but they had me working in a steel mill in Corby ffs, took 18 months to sort it all out, no sorry sir, but I did get a lot of money back as a rebate.
     
  5. Cheers Ears I love you as well

    Magic
     
  6. Sounds awful. But at least he would have had his FRRREEEEEEEEDDDOM!!!!
     
  7. #

    I would have had his bollocks if I could have gotten hold of him.

    Very Slimey these Council Officials,........

    Aye

    Magic
     
  8. You didn't sue for racial discrimination?
     
  9. The Police told me I couldn't sue for Racial Discrimination as Fu*king Porridge Wogs are not a race now feck off home ya basser.

    I said "Please Don't be like that Office Daziel, keep this up and one day some one will Sh*t on you".....................

    Magic
     
  10. no, if you're white you can't do that.

    you'd be sued, as your act of suing them would be considered racist.
     
  11. The Police told me I couldn't sue for Racial Discrimination as Fu*king Porridge Wogs are not a race now feck off home ya basser.

    I said "Please Don't be like that Office Daziel, keep this up and one day some one will Sh*t on you".....................

    Magic
     
  12. We don't want you back here wasting all that lovely money the lovely English give us so we can buy more alochol and deep fried mars bars :p
     

  13. All I would like to say is "Thank you very much all the English people that taught me how to walk on my hind legs and speak and write the Queens English".

    God Bless you all.



    Aye

    Magic
     
  14. No, they are an integral part of the Scottish tourist industry along with rain, dreich days (with or without rain) and midgies. The reason? All damp dark caves (with or without a dead badger) have a Robert the Bruce connection.

    All 10,456 of them.
     
  15. Part Two of the Course is learning how to walk without one's knuckles draging on the floor and how to use a knife and fork :D